Posted by: Junahu | September 15, 2009

Black Mesa incident – Poison Zombie

Poison Zombie: err, I think it spotted us

Poison Zombie

oh crap!

Preface:
Just to make things absolutely clear, I am not the reviewer who was assigned to review Poison Zombie. I’m merely putting a stop gap review here to compensate for the unforgivable amount of time you’ve had to wait. Hopefully this will serve as an adequate substitute while you continue to wait.

Appearance:
I have always been wary of using a “Dojo update” approach to moveset making, as it bleeds quite a lot of the character’s…. character out of the set. The Poison Zombie is naturally something to be feared, and the bright Dojo picture betrays that feeling.
Still, as Dojo pictures go, Poison Zombie’s is especially well done. The date in particular was a great touch, lending the whole thing some deceptive authenticity. And I love the humerous animated gif of a poison headcrab , which accompanies each header. And in a similar compliment, I also love the simplicity of the subheaders with a little faded headcrab next to each one to keep them company.

The efforts you went to, to explain how the Poison Zombie looks, acts and sounds, is nothing short of admirable. In particular the four picture showcase of the Poison Zombie was a great decision (other than the odd one out in the top right) and is definitely something I’d like to see in other movesets.

It’s unfortunate then that the rest of the organisation gradually deteriorates as the moveset progresses.
The Biography was easy to overlook, considering the way it was sandwiched in between two fairly large pictures. That’s pretty problematic, since it is an important biography to read, considering the character.

While there is nothing particularly wrong with the body text of your moveset being entirely white, you do nothing to differentiate it from the text from an ordinary post or comment. This all comes to a head in the main moveset itself where all the attacks look like they are bleeding into one another. If it weren’t for the fact that the attack descriptions were so short, the organisation would have gotten me lost on several occasions.

Writing Style:
Like the organisation, your writing style also starts off well before steadily declining around the middle of the moveset itself.

You let your sense of humour creep into the moveset, which is good, as it keeps the reader entertained. And your writing is always swift and to the point, another good point that will serve you well in future sets. There are some points though, where I thought the pacing could have been helped if you let yourself ramble on a little bit rather than simply launch directly into the next part after explaining the previous bit.

The attacks themselves are where I believe you need the most work. They are, to be frank, underdetailed, and lacking any real energy behind them (i.e.  The reader is not excited by reading them). Even a simple attack can be made to sound exciting and significant with the right choice of words and a little more pontification.

Smash attacks and other moves that can KO need to mention how much the attack knocks the foe away. The easiest way is to simply state the attack’s “killing %” (i.e. the % at which the move will start KOing Mario from the centre of Final Destination).

It’s usually not a good idea to make an attack that is equivilent to an attack that already exists (e.g Your Foreward Tilt is “like Mario’s”). Doing so detracts from the fact that this is Poison Zombie’s moveset, not a mix-and-match of other movesets.

Before I end up just rattling off a generic bunch of hints for newcomers, I’m sure you are already aware of the differences between this set and the big name forerunners of MYM6 such as Espeon or Sloth. If not, then please read those sets to get an impression of what people look for in a moveset.

Originality:
I know you’ve put a lot of thought into making sure that Poison Zombie, and the headcrabs, can’t act in a way that is out of character. And that deserves a lot of praise. Even veteran MYMers like KingK.Rool occasionally produce movesets that encourage out-of-character behaviour (such as Kangaskhan being encouraged to abuse her child in order to bait and attack the opponent)

You’ve also kept the character in synch with the source game, such as the creative way that Headcrab Throw temporarily damages the opponent. I genuinely get the sensation that, from what little you wrote, it all fits the Poison Zombie perfectly.

The regular attacks are all problematically bland and vanilla. It is a problem because it encourages the reader to simply stop reading right there, rather than read on. And if the reader DOES read on, they are seemingly punished with boring sounding attacks.

Playing- Style:
As of MYM6, it has become increasingly important to create movesets where the reader has a genuine sensation that the attacks all work towards some common purpose, a playstyle. With most of the regular attacks lacking in any explored depth, and with even the creative specials being left without and explaination on how and when they should be used, it was hard to see if there was even a playstyle here at all.

The idea of stunning the foe with a bite from a headcrab, then following it up or retreating seems to be a good way to simulate the way they act in-game. There’s also a surprising level of depth in his Down-Special; Roam. Since knocking a headcrab off stage will sprout a new one on the Poison Zombie’s back (thus allowing it to perform the Neutral and Side specials during Roam), the foe is discouraged from attacking the headcrabs. Therfore this heavyweight character can control the stage fairly well, and even combo if given the right circumstances.

Summary:
This moveset has a great deal of potential, and the makings of a great playstyle. The problem with it is that it doesn’t “feel” complete. The attacks read like rough notes and there is little to differentiate one from another. The organisation also suffers through some rough patches, though the presentation is not without its shining moments.

Anyway, I hope this will do for now, in place of a more rounded and professional review.

 

poison headcrab!!End of the review!!poison headcrab

Poison Zombie moveset created by:~ Negi-Kun

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Responses

  1. Which was on the queue longer? Wart or this guy?

  2. Definitely Wart. But Poison Zombie had an assigned Reviewer for almost as long, and there’s no sign the review was going to be made any time soon.

  3. WHAT ABOUT SUKAPON?!

  4. He’ll be up tomorrow, darn it.

    (Oh, and these two guys have had to wait in excess of a month. =P)

    EDIT: Made it today. (h)
    …it’s rather negative though, so be warned… :/

  5. I appreciate the… preview review?
    I believe this will help in future sets of mine, such as the Half Life Minds. If you watch the series Freeman’s Mind, I think you’ll like this teaser. Heh.
    http://www.smashboards.com/showpost.php?p=7139392&postcount=9672

    but srsly bkupa ill find u if u dont hurry up

  6. Oh great. It’s not Bkupa 😛
    Sorry XD

  7. That teaser was cool.

  8. You know… this is the review with the most views, ever. Including that one joke review of de Blob that everybody kept posting on.

    Just goes to show that the people just loooooove Junahu.

    EDIT: The review with the most reviews? Bah. I meant views.

  9. It’s still the review with the most views. Hell, it’s the POST (leaving aside pages which have tabs at the top) with the most views. Junahu, you have some sort of black magic…

    For those who care, after this go:

    Aedi (by Junahu)
    MT’s Sunday Recap Boxset (by MarthTrinity)
    Orientation — Playstyle (by KingK.Rool)
    Pokemon Master (by Junahu)

    It makes me so proud that my little playstyle trifle is up there with crazy Junahu and MT’s recaps… (cry2)

  10. This review got three views TODAY. Either people are using it as some sort of sacred MYMing text or Junahu likes to come back here regularly and refresh a few times just to see his text flash in and out.

    And yes I am the only person who knows or cares but it’s been viewed 862 times and it’s really freaking me out

  11. Forget about 862 views. This page has OVER 2000 BLOODY VIEWS. That’s more than MYM 7 Movesets. It’s more than MYM X Movesets. It’s more than half the other reviews combined. Adequate stopgap substitute review indeed.

  12. Dammit. You don’t have to go home but you can’t stay here ;P


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