Posted by: masterwarlord | August 26, 2010

MW Top 13s — Worst Final Smashes

Ah, the Final Smash. . .That missing uair is something you absolutely –MUST- come up with so that you can account for it before writing the playstyle summary and the true set is complete, but Final Smashes are irrelevant to the grand design of one’s scheme when making a moveset. As such, Final Smashes are often rushed into movesets at the end of production as obligatory filler, as many others don’t care about them and those that treat them as such often don’t care. One of the most common forms of rushed Final Smashes is the mechanic booster, which involves just a generic buff to some random mechanic the set has, such as having infinite ammo for an ammo bank. Rool is most infamous for both rushing Final Smashes and for these mechanic boosters. . .This list will of course keep in mind the standards of the times – which means that sets in MYM 4 and such won’t have anything held against them for having mechanic boosters. Hell, that was actually praised back then, seeing it was still new way back when and it’s an arbitrary way to make the Final Smash look somewhat relevant to the meat of the moveset.

13 – Joe Calzaghe by Junahu – MYM 6

Joe’s Final Smash is a generic mechanic booster, plain and simple. Unlike most mechanic boosters, though, this Final Smash isn’t shameless, and is actually trying to hide and pass itself off as playstyle relevant. To the untrained eye, one has little reason to not just mindlessly nod along and believe Junahu, after all, he’s never done a mechanic booster before and actively preaches against them! But of course, it’s just a clever ruse trying to detract attention from the poorly done and blatantly rushed Final Smash. Of course, Junahu has an actual excuse with this one – it actually was a very rushed moveset, his only one that comes to mind besides Regal, and considering Joe turned out so well it’s hardly surprising the Final Smash was mediocre what with how little time was given to Junahu.

12 – Subaru by Darth Meanie – MYM 7

The mechanic boosting of this Final Smash is minimal, but the rest of it is just generic buffing no better than Wario Man, overpowered as hell with a single “balancing factor” of Subaru taking double damage despite having constant superarmor. Considering she can’t flinch and is superpowered, who would dare attack her? Aside from this, one of the main buffs of this move is to Subaru’s Fsmash, and considering the Final Smash ends so quickly and one doesn’t really “practice” them all that much, it’s much too obscure and specific of a buff that will never be found within the Final Smash’s duration. If anything is to be casual friendly, it’s the Super Attacks Rool so dreads.

11 – Magmortar by Darth Meanie – MYM 5

 

It’s rather unfair to pick on a first moveset, but this is the very end of MYM 5 and it’s –Darth Meanie- for crap’s sake, and the Final Smash is absolutely –atrocious-. DM posted the moveset without a Final Smash and just generically edited in this piece of crap when he realized he needed one, hence why this Final Smash is so very rushed. . .the Final Smash is Giga Impact – AKA Physical Hyper Beam – definitive Pokemon syndrome. Aside from being horrifically generic and OOC, the Final Smash also is horrifically underdetailed. At no point during DM’s brief rambling during the Final Smash does he ever attempt to tell us what this abomination of a Final Smash actually -does-. . .

10 – Wood Man by Agidius – MYM 7

Wood Man’s Final Smash is a fairly generic blast attack, and while that still has flash unlike a mechanic booster it’s pretty bad. What makes this Final Smash stand out, though? Wood Man saws down a gigantic tree to fall across the screen despite his hatred of any harm coming to nature. . .And Agi goes on about how awkward and OOC this is at the start of the move. But no, we’ve no time to change it. We’re rushing this moveset out if it’s the last thing we do! Taking some more time with this moveset to get a better Final Smash could’ve actually significantly benefitted it if it meant more time for the set as a whole, considering this was a rather mediocre set from Agi for its’ time.

9 – Lust by MasterWarlord – MYM 5

The actual gameplay of this Final Smash is actually fairly creative and unique – you play a game of snake with the head of the “snake” being your all-powerful hitbox that the foe has to avoid. For the Final Smash to end, you have to touch part of your ever-extending body, which the foe will of course be trying to bait you into.

So what’s the catch? Well, your “snake” is actual snakes, which Lust’s fingers have turned into. . .Yeah. If you haven’t figured it out, it’s an ability the foolish maker of this moveset pulled out of his ass to give to Lust for no apparent reason just –because- he wanted a unique Final Smash. While it’s a somewhat fitting ability, it’s stretching the boundaries far too much for my taste and now makes me cringe at it. Of course, the bad Final Smash is more memorable because of the terrible moveset it’s attached to. This Final Smash is also very awkwardly described and the moveset fumbles over itself repeatedly as it tries to convey this very simple idea to the reader – this ignorant fool was still in the prime of his worst writing.

8 – Thief Khee’bler by Agidius – MYM 6

Agi doesn’t get that much publicity about this, but he’s actually one of the most common people to use mechanic boosters, as seen in Hornet Man and Sheep Man, Agi’s most famous sets. What separates the Thief’s Final Smash from the rest of the mechanic boosters? Simply because of the fact that the logic for the Final Smash happening is just so. . .Random. Getting a random power boost is fine, but Thief. . .Just. . .Realizes that the Brawlers are all guilty of murder/battery so he’s allowed to use his smashes? That’s it? You don’t need a goddamn mystical power source like a Smash Ball to figure that out, Khee’bler. Considering you’re such an expert on law, I’d expect more of you, Khee’bler. . .

7 – Vaporeon, Jolteon, Flareon, Umbreon, Leafeon by KingK.Rool – MYM 6

It’d be rather a cop-out to include all of these sets on the list, merely acting as filler spots for it. The Eeveelutions are Rool’s most blatant spit in the face at Final Smashes, with these 5 all possessing simple mechanic boosters. Vaporeon, the Eeveelution posted first of them all, has this at the start of his Final Smash. . .“Yes, this is one of those upgrade SAs (Super Attacks, what Rool calls his Final Smashes) Junahu despises”, Rool being proud of the horrible Final Smashes he’s created here that are all each just a token sentence or two. Aside from this, these are worse than the average rushed mechanic boosting final smash because they’re all back to back.

So why are Glaceon and Espeon absent? Espeon actually freezes time for his Final Smash, giving him time to set stuff up and not just being a blatant mechanic booster – it’s also got some of the actual flash Final Smashes need. Glaceon’s Final Smash has –some- unique gameplay even if there is some slight mechanic boosting at the end, but it’s enough to pass when there are plenty of other generic mechanic boosters to choose from.

6 – Psyduck by Half_Silver28 – MYM 7

Not that bad of a Final Smash at a glance. . .It’s just a fairly generic actual attack. While this Final Smash isn’t OOC like Wood Man’s generic attack, this Final Smash actually does the opposite of the one thing that’s good about Mechanic Boosters. You know how mechanic boosters sort of automatically “tie into the playstyle” by being linked to the mechanic? Well, this moveset instantly empties Psyduck’s mechanic (Damage dealt to his head) and how much he has before it gets emptied has no effect on the Final Smash. Indeed, this Final Smash HURTS the playstyle. It seems this Final Smash was intended to be used as a balancing tool seeing it’s a “side-effect”, but the Final Smash isn’t that good in the first place, making the Final Smash just end up underpowered. And yes, the Final Smash was randomly entitled “Darkwing Duck”…

5 – Mr. Sandman by MasterWarlord – MYM 6

Once upon a time, Little Mac was a mediocre moveset made by MT with the coolest thing about it being the epic Final Smash, which just involves the camera turning around and the game essentially turning into Punch-Out. In the next chapter of this tale, Rool started the Punch-Out movement, and when talking with Warlord suggested that the movesets all have Little Mac’s Final Smash to further bind them together. Warlord happily agreed and did it first with Bald Bull (Albeit with a few changes), expecting everyone else to follow along, but then Smady came along and refused, coming up with Von Kaiser’s epic Final Smash, easily one of the best and most memorable. Warlord got the hint and used a different Final Smash with his next Punch-Out moveset, the Bear Hugger, albeit it was an elementary generic mechanic booster.

Later still, in the final chapter of this epic, Warlord made Mr. Sandman and couldn’t come up with any Final Smash whatsoever due to how horrifically generic Sandman’s character was, and ended up reusing Bald Bull’s Final Smash which was stolen from Little Mac, which Warlord didn’t even make himself to start with. At the very least, a unique ability was given to Sandman during the Final Smash stance and the Final Smash it was based off was at least decent, but unlike Bald Bull Sandman has no excuse for this absolutely blatant theft – a good chunk of the Final Smash is just copypasta from Bald Bull. This horrendous Final Smash is the “cherry” on top of the disgusting shit flavored ice cream sunday that is Mr. Sandman. . .

4 – Jason Voorhees by Katapultar – MYM 8

Final Smashes are supposed to show the character at the height of their performance with their ultimate power, but when the spotlight comes onto Jason it only highlights the worst he’s done from a horrific movie called “Jason X” that killed the franchise. This is the best of the best of Jason Voorhees, folks! Aside from the ridiculous source material Katapultar has chosen for this Final Smash, it does more than just play generically like most of the other Final Smashes on the list – you’re actually PUNISHED FOR GETTING THE SMASH BALL. Because Jason Voorhees wasn’t underpowered enough, right? While the Final Smash triples your weight or so (It doesn’t help with your non-existent recovery and speed, so that’s irrelevant), if you get KO’d, the match is over regardless of how many stocks you have left. Indeed, I dare you to find a character who fails harder at 99 Stock Matches with items on. . .Besides Bomber, anyway.

3 – Kangaskhan by KingK.Rool – MYM 6

 

While the individual Eeveelutions were constantly fighting for attention amongst themselves, Kangaskhan, who was posted all by herself, managed to fade entirely into obscurity despite being posted solo. One of the most remembered reasons for this is because Kangaskhan was an abusive parent constantly flailing her child about, with the throwaway explanation of the Kangaskhan being Giovanni’s despite the only reference to Giovanni being in a couple results screen poses. As the set went on, though, several horrible inputs showed their faces back to back. First, Rool’s first signature random flipkick uair, the random grab only Babyskhan can do with no throws, and then, last, but certainly not least, that horrific Final Smash.

The Final Smash is the definition of generic Final Smashes and was completely unacceptable in this day and age, much less from someone like Rool, as Kangaskhan randomly became Gigaskhan. . .Not that we even know what it does, just generic buffs. Rool was so rushed to get the Final Smash that he literally just asked random chatgoers for a Final Smash and took the first suggestion he got – Unsurprisingly, the person who tucked Rool into doing this Final Smash was Kholdstare, as Khold continued to live up to his infamous trolling which never ceases to amaze.

2 – Team Rocket Grunt by KingK.Rool – MYM 7

 

I’ve already told you everything that’s bad about Gigaskhan. . .Now amplify it tenfold as it’s blatantly reused another MYM later, practically 2 MYMs considering Kangaskhan was the very start of MYM 6 and Grunt was the very end of MYM 7. For the Grunt’s Final Smash, a giant hole opens up out of the ground as Giovanni and Gigaskhan come out and the Grunt steps aside, then one of the worst, most shameless Final Smashes ever made happens as Gigaskhan rampages about. What makes this Final Smash even worse is that the Grunt is a 3 part multi set, causing Rool to slap on the same horrific reused Final Smash onto not one, but –3- characters. Gigaskhan is the epitome of rushed Final Smashes and shall be forever credited as an epic trolling job by Kholdstare.

While Kangaskhan herself faded off into obscurity, it wasn’t because of the Final Smash, really. It was because Kangaskhan was only a decent set at best, and Kangaskhan was so insanely outclassed by Rool’s amazing MYM 6 showing that vote split absolutely slaughtered her. The Grunt? He placed second, proving that Final Smashes ultimately don’t matter, and that’s unlikely to ever change.

1 – FMA Man by MasterWarlord – MYM 5

 

Throwaway Final Smashes like Rool’s don’t effect the meat of the moveset which anybody with a functioning brain actually cares about, hence why Rocket Grunt was still able to succeed despite his Final Smash. FMA Man’s Final Smash, though, is the opposite of most of the other Final Smashes on the list. . .It’s a result of putting actual effort into the Final Smash – too much effort. WAAAAAAAAY too much effort. It’s a gigantic extra constantly throbbing and giving the moveset horrible pain combined with more gigantic extras that is dragging this already horrific moveset down immensely with it’s sheer tl;dr factor, with the sole goal of shamelessly trying to get people to read the set based off interactions with their movesets. A pathetic attempt to catch people’s attention that only makes them cringe.

What the Final Smash actually is involves FMA Man transforming into somebody to deceive the victim, then killing them when they least expect it, usually via a gun, with each character having a unique cutscene for their death. As the idiot who made this moveset made more and more of these abominable cutscenes, he jumped the shark further and further with more and more insult to Envy’s character, as he becomes some sort of omniscient god who knows everything and is willing to act out the part no matter the cost, spitting in the face of his pride. Nevermind how several of the scenes aren’t even deception and just involve Envy turning into some gigantic monster to kill the victim. Nevermind how some scenes are ridiculously and laughably graphic for no apparent reason.

This is the worst Final Smash because it sticks out so much and is so memorable – considering the moveset itself is promoting this hideous Final Smash rather than most Final Smashes which movesets try to hide, this is just unforgettable and unforgivable. The maker of this moveset should have his balls cut off while being crucified upside down on a burning cross made of spikes while being raped by Spadefox.

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Responses

  1. Dude, Rocket Grunt’s final smash is amazing!

    For the record, Enker was the original mechanic booster final smash, though it wasn’t really laziness that lead to it as his mechanic was an integral part of the set.

    Fun read. (y)

  2. The Grunt’s losing! He gnashes his teeth and stomps his feet, frustrated… and then his boss, Giovanni himself, appears from a warping panel beside him! He gives the Grunt a stern look, causing him to withdraw his current Pokemon, and then releases his own: it’s Kangaskhan! And that’s not all – Kangaskhan uses HER Final Smash! Yeah, that’s right! It’s… GIGA KANGASKHAN AGAIN! SUPER POWERED GENERIC KANGASKHAN!!!!!! DUN DUUUUUN! YAAAAAAAAAY!

  3. oh wow I’m actually on here lol. I suppose I did make psyduck’s FS too weak. As for it being generic, it was a one-pokeset that wasn’t that good anyhow, so meh.

    And there’s nothing wrong with Darkwing Duck (WARY)

  4. I’m so proud of what I did with Grunt’s FS; I mean, I have three Pokemon and SO much potential and I just call up Generic Kangaskhan again. Bet nobody thought they’d be seeing THAT again!

    But I was certainly never proud of the Eeveelutions’ SAs. (N)

    Anyway, fun list. Less of me than I expected.

  5. Honorable mention goes to Pennywise, who blatantly ripped off of FMA Man.

  6. I very seriously considered including Pennywise, but his animations weren’t so disgustingly OOC as FMA Man’s and they didn’t contribute to a massive tl;dr factor like FMA Man’s. Pennywise is a much better done version of FMA Man’s Final Smash.

  7. ……… But didn’t YOU make Envy’s Final Smash?

  8. I’m surprised Akira’s abomination of a Final Smash isn’t here. It’s vastly worse then a generic mechanic booster. It’s a giant MYM 2 caliber moveset, with nothing interesting or relevant about it. Not to mention a giant tl;dr factor.

  9. Well then, I made it onto a Top 13. (h)
    I -always- forget that Final Smashes exist until the moveset is almost completely finished (more often than not, minutes before I post the set), so it’s no surprise they come off as rushed so often. Then again, I turned off Smash Balls a month after I got Brawl and never turned them back on, so…

    (I still kinda like Khee’bler’s, though. Sure, the logic is wonky, but that’s what makes it so charming. Especially his reason for ending the Final Smash. Still, I’ll try to stick to the flashier stuff for now, and avoid the for-whatever-reason-terrible Mechanic Boosters.)


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