Posted by: masterwarlord | November 1, 2010

MYM Survivor 3 — Day 1

Hades is seen in his underworld lair, sitting on a levitating chair with a TV remote in his hand, flipping channels as he watches god knows what on his magical television screen. As he continues to flip through the channels faster and faster, he mumbles to himself.

“Seen it. Rerun. More reruns. World’s ending in 2012, big whoop. . .And some idiot nobody cares about wins survivor. I was only watching cause of Ken! How stupid could they be to of killed him off? I mean, really. . .Even –I- could do something better than this crap.”.

As if the gears just started cranking in his head, Hades slowly rubs his chin before slowly coming up with a gigantic devilish grin and laughing, then ignites the television in fire as the real survivor show is briefly shown on it before it melts. “It’s time for some –REAL- entertainment. I’m done watching the same crap over and over.”. He yells out “Pain! Panic! Get your sorry asses down here this instant!”.

Pain and Panic hastily run into the room from separate directions and crash into each other stupidly, Pain crushing Panic. He gets off of Panic, who is now a pancake, before he cartoonishly returns to normal. They salute Hades. “Pain and Panic reporting for duty, your hellishness!”.

“Took you long enough. Now, I don’t need you two morons to actually do anything for me – not yet, anyway. I could force you guys to do it, but knowing you two you’d just screw it up.”.

Pain protests as Panic hastily just hand motions to try to get him to call it off. “Oh c’mon, boss, what’s the worst we’ve don-“.

Hades’ hair lights on fire more greatly in anger at this, and before Pain can finish he hurls a fireball forward at Pain and Panic. Pain uses Panic as a shield from the blow, causing him to become charred horribly and cough up smoke in pain. Panic sighs and moves away from Pain. “Oh c’mon. . .Just give us one chance, huh?”.

Hades twitches. “Y’know the price of failure, you worthless little grub?”. Pain just shakes his head stupidly before Hades’ hair goes on fire more extensively again. “THEN I’LL SHOW YOU!”. Pain cringes before Hades charges up another huge fireball. . .Before throwing it at Panic, turning him into a pile of ashes before he reforms.

Panic wheezes and motions off to Pain. “Why aren’t you hitting-“. Of course, Panic gets interrupted by another fireball charring him, causing Pain to laugh and Hades’ eye to twitch. “Did I say you could talk?”. Panic says no, before getting hit by ANOTHER fireball. “I didn’t say you could talk yet, now did I? I thought you’ve of learned your lesson the last time, sheesh. . .What’s with you? Why can’t you be more like Pain over here?”. Panic just trembles and doesn’t say anything before being hit by yet another fireball. “I ASKED YOU A QUESTION!”.

Panic just cowers away. “I. . .I dunno, boss!”.

Hades just shakes his head and throws his arms up in the air. “How’d I get stuck with you. . .”. He pauses briefly. “Now, seeing I don’t have anything for you two to do yet, you’re probably wonderin’ why I called you here, cause it sure wasn’t to see your ugly mugs. You’ll learn along with the guests when I bring ‘em through the portals. When they get here, just play along, kapeesh?”.

Pain nods, while Panic says “gotcha” back to Hades, resulting in him getting hit by another fireball. “Again, how many times do I have to tell you idiots don’t talk unless I tell you to talk? I’m gonna want you to keep your yaps shut when they get here anyway, wouldn’t want you two to give off a bad impression to our guests.”.

Pain rubs his chin. “So who’re our guests, boss?”.

Hades shrugs. “Well. . .I’m plannin’ on bringin’ some guests in to play a little game, see? Seeing I’m too bored to handpick ‘em, though, I’m thinkin’ about just going with the luck of the draw to see who I get.”.

Hades goes to open 16 portals one at a time while Panic goes over to Pain, eye twitching violently. “How come he doesn’t fry you when –you- talk, huh?!?”.

“You gotta learn to realize when he’s in a bad mood, my man, and just not question his reasoning. If he’s mad, that’s all the reason you need.”.

“Well if he was so mad, why didn’t he hit you, huh?”.

“Cause he wasn’t mad at me. In fact, you acting so stupid is making me look good right now.”. Pain chuckles. “Watch. . .”. Pain clears his throat. “You totally fail at being evil, Hades-”.

Hades’ eye twitches and his hair fire erupts as he goes to throw a fireball at Pain, but Pain non-chalantly “finishes” his sentence. “-is what Panic thinks.”. At the last second Hades redirects the fireball at Panic, then Hades resumes opening portals.
Panic reforms and glares at Pain. “What’d you do that for, huh?”.

“If he wasn’t in such a good mood with me and such a bad one with you, he wouldn’t of believed me when I said you were responsible.”.

“. . .Thanks for the tip. I’ll be sure to pay you back some time. . .”.

Panic glares at Pain, before Hades finishes all 16 of the portals. “Alright, stop being stupid if that’s even possible for ya, because I’m about to bring these guys through.”. The 16 portals each spit out a character, closing behind them.

Cranky Kong – BKupa666, MYM 3
Pennywise – BKupa666, MYM 6
Pegasus – dancingfrogman, MYM 6
Bear Hugger – MasterWarlord, MYM 6
Von Kaiser – SmashDaddy, MYM 6
Duke Oliver – KirbyWizard, MYM 6
Spadefox – Hyper_Ridley, MYM 7
Miles Edgeworth – TWILTHERO, MYM 8
Scarmiglione – UserShadow7989, MYM 8
Q – MarthTrinity, MYM 8
Jason Voorhees – Katapultar, MYM 8
Haunter – n88, MYM 8
Mr. Potato Head – BKupa666, MYM 8
Hannibal Bean – MasterWarlord, MYM 8
Rocket Executive Hugo – MasterWarlord, MYM 8
Omi – Flyinfilipino, MYM 8

The characters go to get up, and Hades hastily starts talking before any of them can even realize where they are, talking incredibly fast. “Hey, how ya doin’? Good of ya to drop on by. You’ve all been brought here to play a game I like to call “Survivor” for my amusement. Heard of it? No? Too damn bad. The basic rundown is you lot’ll all be split into two groups and be sent off to locations where you’ll probably die. At the end of the day, you’ll play a game where any of ya will probably die, then the losing team will have to vote off one of their members who’ll also die. Me? Hades, lord of the dead, so don’t worry, once you inevitably die, you’ll be here to stay, so make yourselves at home, why dontcha? Get comfy, eternity’s a long damn time. The last person alive’ll be allowed to leave this place with their mortality still in-tact, but I dunno why you’d be interested. Being a mortal is overrated, so soft and squishy, y’know? Don’t get any ideas about tryin’ to escape or killin’ each other to make it end faster, or else this’ll happen.”.

Hades grabs Panic and strangles him horribly before incinerating him into ashes, before he reforms and collapses forward onto his stomach, entirely out of breath. “We understand each other? Good. I’ll see ya all back here tonight for the first game.”. Hades motions to Pain and Panic. “These two idiots will be around to keep watch on ya, and I can still see ya from here, so don’t get any bright ideas. Any questions?”.

Roughly around half the cast go to say something or other, but are immediately interrupted by Hades. “Good, no questions. Let’s start the game then, shall we?”. Hades opens two portals on either side of the cast of characters, each of the two portals sucking up eight characters, as well as Pain and Panic.


Cranky Kong
Hannibal Bean
Bear Hugger
Mr. Potato Head
Jason Voorhees

The characters of the first group are spit out of their portal inside an old abandoned house. Cranky gets up off and dusts himself off, propping himself up against a wall as he musters the strength to do so. “So any of whippersnappers actually hear what that sleazy used cars salesman had to say? He was talkin’ too fast for my old ears to pick up.”.

Hannibal uses the moby morpher to turn to his heavyweight size. “I heard every word, but I’m not sticking around for a single damned second to play this stupid game.”. Hannibal takes out the Ying-Yang Yo-yo and says its’ name, but no portal opens up. He looks weirded out before trying it a few more times before Pain laughs.

“If you heard every word, then you’d of heard our boss is the lord of the dead. He’s not gonna just let you open a portal, and if you try to leave anyway he’ll just kill you early.”.

Hannibal chuckles. “Psshaw. He can’t be more powerful than somebody of my level!”.

Pain looks at a random watch that’s appeared on his wrist and counts down with his fingers from 3 to 1, after which a portal appears and Hades’ arm comes out of it to throw a fireball out of it at Hannibal, lighting him on fire. Hades pops his head out of the portal and imitates Hannibal’s southern accent and repeats what he just said sarcastically before going back into and closing the portal. Hannibal stops, drops, and rolls about on the floor to try to get rid of the fire, screaming in pain, but to no avail. Pain chuckles again. “Told you!”. Bear Hugger gathers some spit in his mouth before letting it out on Hannibal, causing the fire to go out.

Hannibal wipes the spit off him in annoyance. “Dammit, why couldn’t you of just let me get burned to death?”.

Bear Hugger shakes his head. “You were brighter than the northern lights! Were ya expecting me to jus’ let ya light on fire like a Christmas tree, eh?”.

“I expect you to come up with a less stupid solution next time. . .”. Hannibal turns to Mr. Potato Head, who is busy staring at him. “What?”.

Potato Head snaps out of it. “Nothing. It’s just been a while since I’ve seen another potato. Kinda surprised.”.

Hannibal squints at Potato Head. “The name’s Hannibal BEAN, dammit! There’s a huge difference. . .”.

Bear Hugger nods in agreement. “No kiddin’ there, partner! Potatoes work much better in a stew than beans!”.

Hannibal and Potato Head both glare at Bear Hugger angrily before Cranky speaks up again. “Will you idiots stop talking about nothing and give me a repeat of just what the hell’s going on here? Show some damn respect for your elders!”.

Pennywise comes over to Cranky. “Don’t worry, old timer. I’ll give you the low-down. . .Down where we are now, everything floats up.”.

“Everything floats, eh? Y’mean like the engine for that new fangled Brawl game? I remember back in my day we heavyweights didn’t float – we fell right back down and got comboed to death! You kids today have it so easy, I tell ya. . .”.

“He also said that you’re going to die in 3 days by being eaten from the inside out, and that everybody you’ve ever cared about will die along with you. How’s that make ya feel?”.

“If it means I don’t have to deal with idiots like you, so be it. If my good for nothing grandson goes down with me, all the better.”.

Pain looks weirded out. “Eh, if you hate your grandson, he won’t actually die then. . .”.

Cranky angrily curses to himself before Pennywise looks all the more annoyed and walks away. “Can’t scare this guy. . .He’s lost contact with the outside world in his old age. His flesh would be disgusting.”. Pennywise walks over to Q and Jason, who are busy having a staring contest with each other. “So, why are you two wearing those masks? You too ashamed of your personal appearances to take em off? What would happen if, say, per chance. . .Your mask. . .”. Pennywise goes over and placess his hand on Jason’s mask. “FLOATS!”. He goes to remove Jason’s mask and take it up off his body, revealing his face which just snarls at Pennywise before smacking him on top of the head and moaning loudly.

Mr. Potato Head lets out a scream at this. “Give him his mask back, give him his mask back!”.

Pennywise chuckles. “May’ve failed to scare the intended target, but this has. . .Unintentional benefits. . .”. He points off towards Potato Head. “Sic ‘em.”. In response to this, Jason simply smacks Pennywise again, much to Pennywise’s annoyance, before he gives Jason his mask back. “There! You happy now?!? Now do as I say.”. In response, Jason moans loudly and predictably smacks Pennywise once again. Pennywise throws up his arms in annoyance. “Fine, fine! You’re hopeless.”. He turns to Q. “Now then. . .What about you, huh? Let’s see what’s under that mask. . .”. Pennywise puts his hand on Q’s face and pulls on it, but nothing happens due to it not being a mask. Pennywise continues to pull on Q’s face before Q finally looks down at him and does a lightning fast smack at him, knocking him to the ground. Q then proceeds to stomp down on Pennywise and does a series of more lightning quick punches on Pennywise before backing off and going idle again.

Cranky laughs heartily at this. “So you float, huh? Then how come you got comboed to death, you overweight good for nothin’?”.

Pennywise grumbles and gets up. “Don’t worry. You’ll see what I mean soon enough. . .”. Pennywise laughs and goes to leave the room, with Potato Head staring at Q, who has resumed his staring contest with Jason.

“So uhhh. . .What –is- that guy? He’s not wearing a mask, so that’s his face. . .Does that make him. . .A robot?”.

Hannibal rolls his eyes. “No, he’s a alien from outer space. Yes, he’s a robot.”.

After a brief pause, Q slowly goes to approach the group and speaks in a deep yet not robotic voice. “I am. . .Abomination.”.

Bear Hugger chuckles at Hannibal. “You were sayin’, eh?”.

Hannibal folds his arms. “How am I supposed to know what he is? Now then. . .I propose we figure out just where the hell we are and do some explorin’, seeing we’re apparently gonna be stuck here for a while.”.

Cranky hobbles over to Hannibal. “I’d be all for that if you’d stop blabbing your gums about nothing and told me just what in tarnation’s going on!”.

Hannibal rolls his eyes. “Like I needa tell an old fart like you. You’re just waitin’ for them to finish diggin’ your grave at the cemetery so ya can rest in peace.”.

Cranky whacks Hannibal over the head with his cane, which Hannibal shrugs off casually, then proceeds to knock Cranky down to the ground with a sweep of his arms casually. He laughs, but Cranky takes out a potion and throws it into his mouth as he does so, causing him to choke and puke up some acid in pain. “Fine, fine, you’ve proved your point, dammit! You can come with us.”.

“I don’t give a damn about whether or not I can tag along with you overgrown vegetables, I just wanna know what that fast talking idiot was going on about.”.

Pain smirks. “You do realize that “fast talking idiot” can hear you, right? You might wanna pick your words more carefully. . .The whole point of this is so he can watch you for some entertainment, so pissing him off isn’t that great of an idea. . . The idea is you mortals have to all stay together for a long period of time, and every 3 days you fight the other group. If you lose, you vote somebody from your team off”.

“So let me get this straight. . .The explanation for this is we’re just that idiot’s playthings?”.

Potato Head shrugs. “Eh, don’t worry. It’s not so bad being a toy. You’ll get used to it.”.

Hannibal raises an eyebrow. “. . .I take it you’re not one to think much of yourself if you consider yourself a –toy-. . .”.

“. . .No, I mean, I’m literally a toy. . .Y’know. Something a kid plays with?”. Potato Head rearranges his body to have all of his pieces in different positions. “Look, I’m Picasso!”.

After an awkward silence with potato Head squinting spitefully and putting his parts back to normal, Bear Hugger speaks up. “Eh, what kinda kid needs a toy as big as you?”.

“. . .I’m not big. I was just assuming all of you guys were as small as I am. . .”.

Cranky whacks Potato Head with his cane. “Well think again. Back in my day, I was a gigantic hairy ape, climbing buildings, kidnapping maidens. . .It was the life. You vegetables and your unnaturally large worlds. . .Why, back in my day-”.

Hannibal clears his throat and speaks over Cranky as he continues to rant. “Now, as I was sayin’ a couple minutes ago, let’s cut the chit-chat and get a grasp of our surroundin’s. Better than just standin’ around here doin’ nothin’.”.

Bear Hugger nods in agreement. “Aye. The only reason ya shouldn’t be movin’ is when there’s food to be eaten, and I’ve never been too keen on vegetables like you. Let’s get goin’.”.

Hannibal and Potato Head glare at Bear Hugger spitefully before going to leave, while Cranky goes to hobble along after them at a snail’s place, mumbling something or other and shaking his cane at them. Bear Hugger simply picks up Cranky over his shoulder and goes to follow after them, much to Cranky’s protest. “Put me down, dammit! I can walk well enough without you doin’ it for me! First we have games that beat themselves for you, now this?!?”.

The camera pans over to where Bear Hugger was standing as the group of four characters goes off into the distance to reveal Scarmiglione, who was stuck under Bear Hugger for the entire duration of the cutscene. He turns up his face to look at him and squints at him in hatred. “Foolsssssss. . .You’ll pay for that. . .”. Scarmiglione gets up and into a lurching stance, then goes after the group to pursue them ever so slowly.

Q and Jason are still busy staring at each other without uttering so much as a word, with Pain looking between them and the rest of the characters awkwardly. “Dammit, who do I keep an eye on. . .? Oh! I know!”. Pain rips one of his eyeballs out of its’ sockets, then throws it after Scarmiglione, which latches onto him. Pain proceeds to get onto his back into a relaxed position as he looks at Q and Jason. The camera cuts to a shot of the main group going through the house before the level starts up.


Level 1
Play as: Hannibal Bean, Mr. Potato Head, Bear Hugger, Cranky Kong
Stock: 4

I could say this is an obligatory introductory easy level, but would you look at this cast again? Don’t even try to pretend this is a real game. As such, the difficulty is decent right off the bat, but this level doesn’t really have much in the way of gimmicks. Most of the inhabits of the house are undead Mario enemies, and Boos behave normally, meaning your only real method of hitting them is with a bair. Boos are typically on both sides of most rooms along with Dry Bones, meaning the longer you stay in a room the more screwed over you become as the Dry Bones just regenerate and the Boos close in, meaning you have to constantly turn back and forth.


Scarmiglione continues stalking along behind the group, finally having caught up to them with his awkward hunched-over walking. “Good. . .Good. . .I took a lot of damage from that overweight buffoon before. . .Now I just need to take a little more damage so I can use my ultimate form on them. . .I’ll just go in this closet and poison myself subtly. . .”. Scarmiglione goes to enter the contest before coming out of another closet just around the corner from the group in Scooby Doo fashion. Frantically, Scarmiglione goes back to open the door to try to hide, but once he opens it it’s just an ordinary closet. A Boo comes out of the closet and sticks out its’ tongue at Scarmiglione before laughing, ducking back into the closet before Scarmiglione can grab it. “Dammit. . .I can’t let them catch up to me while I’m still so weak! Have to keep going. . .”. With this, Scarmiglione breaks out into a sprint.


Level 2
Play as: Scarmiglione
Stock: 1

Right with level 2, we already have a more specialized level. At first glance this is a simple chase level, with you having to flee from the other four characters – if they get you in their sights you lose. However, you start at 75%, and once you hit 125% and turn to your true form, if you let yourself get into the sights of the other characters a brawl will start up, with 3 of the enemy team out at a time. You have to rack up damage on yourself with your own moves or by being hit by enemies, but you can only hit yourself so much before you have to keep running, and it’s only so long before you’ll eventually run into a dead end. You’re only required to kill one of them to win the level, but the gameplay continues until all of them die or you do. If you want to actually kill them all you’ll want to leave behind Poison Gas or minions behind to slow them down and rack up their damage, as well as set some up at the end to help in the final battle.


Scarmiglione is seen in his ultimate form on top of Potato Head. He does a gigantic swipe at him, knocking his pieces all across the room everywhere. He laughs in an otherworldly voice before being grabbed in a head lock from behind by the Bear Hugger. He struggles to try to get out of his grip and does a good job, but Hannibal extends out some tentacles around Scarmiglione to keep him down. Cranky goes in and throws a potion down Scarmilgione’s throat to finish the job, causing him to puke up some liquid in pain. The fact Bear Hugger is holding him in the head lock causes the pain to get bottled up in his neck, though, causing his neck to swell to painful proportions before he finally breaks out of Bear Hugger’s grip and pukes it out, deforming into his regular weak form and passing out.

Hannibal goes to finish him, but Bear Hugger stops him. “Eh, dontcha remember that guy? He was one of the people brought in to play the game, and if we kill him I doubt that hoser with the fiery hair’ll be too happy.”.

Potato Head gets up and goes to collect his missing pieces and put them back into place. “So? He tried to kill us! He broke the rules first, so we’re clean.”.

Cranky spits down at Scarmiglione. “After that beating we gave him, I doubt he’d be stupid enough to try it again. If he tries this shit again, we finish him.”.

Hannibal nods in agreement. “Sounds fair. Now then, let’s try and find a way out of this dump. I don’t have time for this pointless game. . .”.

The group continues on, leaving Scarmiglione’s corpse behind. The camera pans ahead of them to show Pennywise chuckling from behind the corner. “With them having been weakened and me having the element of surprise, I’ll scare the living daylights out of them. . .”.


Level 3
Play as: Pennywise
Stock: 1

This is a similar level to the last – you have to keep ahead of the enemy group, but you have much more leeway this time around with the level being much longer. Of course, your goal is still ultimately to kill them. If you fall behind, you don’t actually lose, though – it just immediately shifts to a Brawl, with you being able to pick up where you left off with as Scarmiglione against the enemy group, them still even keeping their damage meters in-tact. However, if you sucked as Scarmiglione, you’ll have to make use of various traps you can set up throughout the level. These traps can only hold one person each and don’t actually kill them – it just traps them in a pit too deep to escape. There’s only two of these traps in the level, but if you kill a character with nobody else around Pennywise will feed off of them, healing himself completely. Don’t worry about getting out of the pits – when not in a fight Pennywise’s recovery is infinite in this level. If you really need a way to “Trap” a third character, you can also lure the Boos through the level all to one spot, as the whole level is 1 “room”.


We cut back to Jason and Q, who are still staring at one another with Pain watching them casually. Finally, Jason blinks, what with him being a living organism, and Q immediately does a dashing punch forwards into his gut at the split second he blinks. Q immediately goes to follow up the punch with an uppercut, but Jason dodges the punch and does a slash at Q with his machete. Q does a diving tackle at Jason and they roll about on the floor together in Pain’s direction, forcing him to get off his ass and get out of the way.


Q Vs. Jason Voorhees Vs. Pain
Stock: 1 (You) 2 (Main enemy) 1 (Pain)

You can pick either character, but the one you don’t choose will have 2 stocks while you’ll just have one. To help even out the odds, though, Pain is on the field. He’s very underpowered and won’t attack unless approached, but your main enemy will treat him with as much hostility as he treats you.


Ultimately Q triumphs over Jason with his speed, smacking him with more and more very sudden movements as Jason does his telegraphed attacks. For the finishing blow, Q picks up and throws Jason into a bookshelf, causing it to get knocked down and all the books to fall on top of him before the bookshelf itself does. Q looks down at the KO’d Jason with an emotionless stare before uttering “Weak”, then leaves the room. Pain follows after Q and chuckles. “Nice fight with that guy back there!”. Q ignores Pain, annoying him. After a pause, he speaks up again. “Oh c’mon. Don’t give me the silent treatment!”. Q turns to look down at Pain and stares with his emotionless stare for a good few seconds, causing Pain to cringe. The staring continues a while until Pain blinks, causing Q to kick him very hard. Pain splats against the wall and slowly slides down before letting out a wheeze while Q just stares at him the entire time. “Weak.”.

Q turns his back to Pain and goes to leave the room as the screen fades out and back in, then Pennywise and Scarmiglione can be seen walking along together. Scarmiglione talks with a slight lisp. “Ssssssssso, you’ve all got them trapped in pits ready for me to get vengeance upon?”.

Pennywise nods. “Yeah, that’s right. Couldn’t of done it myself. . .After you help me scare the living wits out of ‘em, I’ll devour them at the peak of their fear. . .”.

“Are we going off to ssssssee them, then?”.

“What? No, no. . .Seeing they’re already trapped, I decided I’d come over and get those other two before they went too far. Those cowards with so much fear they can’t even show their own faces.”.

“From what I sssssaw of them, they ssssseemed like they could be potential alliesssssss. . .”.

“Pffft. I tried already. They’re mindless. Can’t be used as anything but prey.”.

With that, they walk into the room where this all started to find Jason regaining consioucness. Scarmiglione goes to help Jason up, but he swats the hand away and picks up his machete. Jason looks upwards as if sensing Q to reveal that Q is climbing up a flight of stairs far above Jason. Jason points his machete up at Q, then goes to trudge on after him up the stairs. Scarmiglione turns to Q and chuckles. “Told you he could be convinced. . .”. Pennywise scowls before they go with Jason up the stairs.


Q Vs. Jason Voorhees, Scarmiglione, Pennywise
Stock: 1/1/1/1

This takes place on a staircase as large as the Bridge of Eldin, with you starting at the top and the other characters at the bottom. Only Pennywise’s movement speed isn’t pitiful of the enemy characters, meaning Pennywise will come up first and you’ll have some time to deal with him before the others get up to you. What makes this possible, though, is that there’s a piano and a bookcase you can push down at the people climbing up the stairs, which deal 20 hits of 1% per second and dragging knockback, doing massive damage and bringing them down to the bottom of the stairs. In addition, there’s a chandelier that you can attack to bring down on somebody if they do manage to get past your defenses, which deals 30% and knockback that kills at 75%. You’ll need to kill at least two of them with your surroundings if you want to pull off your grab based stall kills, though if one of them does survive make sure it’s Scarmiglione in his worthless regular form.


Q stands casually up at the top of the staircase, waiting for the group of characters to approach him. . .The moment they reach the top, Q instantly leaps backwards and smacks forwards a piano to slide down the staircase after them. Pennywise and Scarmiglione go to turn around and run from it in panic even more quickly than they were running up, while Jason still approaches it anyway. All 3 of them get crushed against the wall by it, while Q just stares down at them again. “Weak.”.

Q proceeds to leave, and the camera fades in and out before the group gets up from under the piano. Scarmiglione glares at Pennywise. “I delayed getting my revenge on those other foolsssss for this?”.

Pennywise groans. “Look, how was I supposed to know he’d do that? Either way, those other losers are still stuck down there in those pits, so you’ll get your revenge and I’ll get my meal.”.

Pennywise and Scarmiglione go to leave, Scarmiglione looking back at Jason who is going up the stairs after Q again, motioning him to come with them. “Forget him! He’s long gone. . .We have more important matterssss to attend to. . .”. Jason continues glaring up where Q went before reluctantly coming along with Pennywise and Scarmiglione. . .


Potato Head and Hannibal are seen stuck in the basement, having fallen through a trap door. The room’s fairly small, and at this point Potato Head is resting up against a wall as if having accepted his fate, but Hannibal is constantly trying to latch onto the exit with his tentacles to try to pull himself out. He’s unable to get a good enough grip though due to the terrain being too slippery, massively annoying him. Potato Head sighs. “Give it up, Bean. You’ve been at that for over an hour or so, it’s not gonna magically start working.”.

Hannibal squints at Potato Head in annoyance. “And what do you expect me to do instead, Potato? I’m not going to just sit here and waste my precious time. Much less die, after how long I spent in that damn alternate dimension. . .Anyway, I –did- come up with an alternative, but you refuse to help me.”.

“Well yeah. After you turn small and I throw you out, why would you use your tentacles to help me out, huh?  You wouldn’t be able to lift me and would just fall back down here. Why should I trust you?”.

“Because how else are you gonna get outta here? Don’t you remember the part of the game where we vote people out? You’re gonna needa trust people and form alliances if you don’t wanna be the victim of another alliance.”. Hannibal extends out his arm to Potato Head. “Trust me.”.

Potato Head sighs before reluctantly shaking Hannibal’s hand. Hannibal uses the Moby Morpher to turn to his true small size, then Potato Head scoops him up and does a wind up before throwing up and out of the pit. Hannibal returns to normal with the Moby Morpher, then laughs. “You’re far too gullible. Thanks for showing me that you Potatoes are nothing to worry about.”.

Potato Head folds his arms as Hannibal walks away and props himself up against a wall, not saying anything aloud. “I KNEW I shouldn’t of trusted him! Oldest trick in the book. . .His own logic’s gonna come back to bite him, though, as I’ll just vote -him- off. . .Heh heh”.


Cranky Kong and Bear Hugger are seen in another section of the basement, with a trap door up far above them. Bear Hugger is seen repeatedly ramming into a wall over and over with Cranky’s hands over his ears. “Dammit, will you stop that?!? You’re just ramming what very little intelligence you have outta ya by doin’ that! Back in my day, if we wanted to solve problems we used our heads!”.

Bear Hugger rams into the wall headfirst again. “But I am using my head!”.

Cranky facepalms. “A pun? Really? Back in my day, we had actually good humor, none of these crappy puns! It’s almost as bad as the alliteration of those goddamn Kremlings. . .”.

Bear Hugger stops ramming his head into the wall and rubs his head. “Well, what’d you suggest we do instead, eh? What’s your plan?”.

“You Canadians and your goddamn fowcharts! Back in my day, we didn’t need plans, we just had enough common sense to get out of situations like these.”.

Bear Hugger folds his arms. “Hey now. You can insult me if you wanna, but don’t you dare insult Canada! What “common sense” solution you got in store then, eh?”.

Cranky thinks briefly before giving a solution. “How about you throw me up outta here? You were able to carry me around before fine. . .Despite me protesting constantly and asking you to let me down every single goddamn minute. . .”.

Bear Hugger shrugs. “Sure, I’m always willing to help a guy out, eh!”.

Bear Hugger picks up Cranky and throws him out of the basement, Cranky landing face-first outside. He struggles to get up and shakes his cane down at the Bear Hugger. “Try for a softer landing next time, will ya?”.

Bear Hugger shrugs innocently. “Sorry. . .But how are you gonna get me outta here again? Next part of your plan?”.

“I told you I don’t believe in those damn flowcharts. . .I’ll look for help or some other way to get you out. Wait here. . .As if I’d waste my time on that buffoon. . .”.

Bear Hugger suspects nothing and thanks Cranky as he goes before going back to ramming the side of the wall, while Cranky hobbles along for a bit before reuniting with Hannibal Bean. “Glad –somebody- wasn’t stupid enough to fall into one of those traps. . .”.

Cranky looks somewhat nervous “Well, actually. . .”. Cranky clears his throat suddenly. “Yeah. That bearded Canadian’s just a big idiot and fell for the trap hook line and sinker. So what happened to that other vegetable friend of yours?”.

“Potato man? He’s in a trap too. . .And will you stop calling me a damn vegetable? Just call me Hannibal. . .”.

“Whatever. I can’t be bothered to remember what you’re called anyway. . .”.

“Oh, I’m sure I could help you remember. . .”. Hannibal extends out a good deal of tentacles.

“Look, that used car salesman guy almost burned you to death, you’re not making much of an impression beyond being a vegetable. Back in my day, vegetables didn’t talk back. . .”.

Hannibal scowls before calming down. “There’s no arguing with this guy. . .I probably already made Potato man back there pissed at me, so I’d best not become too unpopular. Whatever. Let’s just see if we can find the way outta here.”.

“Definitely. Can’t get any damn quiet around this place. . .”.


Level 4
Play as: Hannibal Bean, Cranky Kong
Stock: 3

This level mainly takes advantage of Hannibal’s small form, having lots of small crevices only he can get into. While several of these areas just lead to secrets, there are points where you can skip rooms that would otherwise be a very difficult forced fight against mass enemies. The problem, though, is that these two places where you can skip the fights are large mazes small Hannibal has to go through, and there’s even the occasional rat inside these places so you don’t get entirely unchallenged – the small areas you’re going through were created by them in the first place, after all.


Hannibal and Cranky reach a dining room, where a dining table is filled to the brim with food. Both Hannibal and Cranky lick their lips at the sight of this, Hannibal shrugging. “It may not be the exit, but I’ll take it. Haven’t eaten all day.”.

Cranky ignores Hannibal and approaches a Banana Cream Pie on the table, the background turning into a cartoony banana based one as Cranky floats towards the pie, following its’ scent, as if the Story Mode turned into Looney Tunes. Just as he gets there, though, reality comes back as Hannibal is already there, taking a gigantic chomp at the pie and devouring it whole, making Cranky stop his cartoonish floating and plop onto the floor. Cranky squints at Hannibal in annoyance before muttering some curses at him and leaping out at him. The screen cuts to Q entering the room, and he proceeds to stare at Hannibal and Cranky. Hannibal and Cranky keep at it for a bit, but eventually slowly turn to notice Q and stop their fighting, Hannibal speaking up. “What’re you lookin’ at?”. The screen zooms in on Hannibal as Hannibal and Cranky stare at Q, and once Hannibal blinks Q does a dashing punch across the room to knock Hannibal across the table, causing a bowl of soup to splatter over him. Cranky chuckles at this. “Who says Beans don’t work in a stew?”.


Q Vs. Cranky Kong Vs. Hannibal Bean
Stock: 1/1/1

You play Q in this match in what would be a standard FFA, but the table is a gigantic platform in the middle of the stage, with the sides of the table being walls. On top of the table is mass food items just like Brawl Food, which Hannibal and Cranky are fully capable of eating while you cannot, seeing Q is a robot/too focused on combat. Hannibal can be a threat if the computer plays defensively on the table with a root and abuses the food to its’ fullest extent, but the AI ever doing anything intelligent is exceedingly rare, now isn’t it?


We cut back to Mr. Potato Head, who’s busy being bored in the basement. He takes some Cheese Puffs out of his rear compartment and snacks on them while waiting. . .But eventually he starts hearing periodic noises coming from behind him. He goes to turn around as the noise gets louder and louder every time it comes, backing away from the wall and putting up his hands in front of him in fear. Eventually, the Bear Hugger rams through the wall and keeps going after he gets through before hitting the next wall, which is apparantely made of much harder material, as a painful crash is heard as Bear Hugger rams his head into it and gets knocked over onto his ass. He rubs his head in pain for a while before looking around, Potato Head letting out a sigh of relief. “Oh good, it’s just you. . .So you came to get me outta this mess, right?”.

Bear Hugger looks weirded out. “Eh, no. I was just trying to get outta that other room over there. . .”.

Potato Head goes to look into the other room before facepalming. “Knew it was too good to be true. . .”.

Bear Hugger lets out a goofy grin. “Don’t worry. That old grandpa said he was lookin’ for a way to get me outta here. I’m sure he’ll help you out too, eh?”.

Potato Head sighs. “That monkey probably just fooled you too. . .Face it. He’s not coming back.”. Potato Head has a brief pause. “What would you say to getting back at him? Voting him off?”.

Bear Hugger puts his hands on his hips. “He wouldn’t just forget about me. I was the one who helped him out in the first place!”.

“And I was the guy who helped out the bean guy, and he’s not coming back for me.”.

“You’re probably just being paranoid. Have more faith in people, eh?”.

“He specifically said he wasn’t coming back you moron! Now try and come up with a solution to get out of here if you don’t wanna rot down here forever. . .”.

Bear Hugger enters a thinking pose before Pennywise’s voice can be heard. “It sounds to me like –floating- would help you out here. . .”.

Potato Head looks afraid and looks for where the voice is coming from while Bear Hugger nods. “Yeah, that’s a great idea!”.

Pennywise chuckles as the screen pans up to show him, Scarmiglione, and Jason up at the top of the hole, out of sight of Potato Head and Bear Hugger. Scarmilgione uses his earth magic to open up a hole from the bottom of the cellar, and once it’s opened up a massive amount of balloons come up out of it. Pennywise laughs evily while Potato Head shrieks and Bear Hugger lets out a good natured laugh. “It’s just like at the fair, eh?”. Bear Hugger goes to grab a balloon, but it pops, splattering it’s contents of blood everywhere. All the other balloons instantaneously pop and cover the whole room in blood before Pennywise, Scarmiglione, and Jason hop down into the hole and Pennywise motions forward towards them, Jason leading the charge.


Pennywise, Scarmiglione, Jason Voorhees Vs. Mr. Potato Head, Bear Hugger
Stock: 2 (Player) 1 (Potato Head) 1 (Bear Hugger)

You play Pennywise’s group in this match, but you only get to pick two of the three characters. The unselected character will be a computer ally on your side. The catch of this match is that Pennywise wants to properly scare the enemy characters before he can feast on them, making them as delicious as possible. This means you lose if Potato Head/Bear Hugger die before reaching 200%. Considering the only blast zone is vertical, though, you’ll need 200% to kill Bear Hugger anyway. Potato Head can be more of an issue, though, especially considering you have an ally who doesn’t care whether or not foes are at 200%.


When the cutscene kicks in, the fight is brutal enough that Bear Hugger is being very serious about it, squeezing the frail Scarmiglione in one arm while fending off Pennywise with his other arm. Jason is slicing off all of Potato Head’s parts one by one, and Pennywise dodges nearly all of Bear Hugger’s attacks to the point where he starts taunting him every time he misses. Bear Hugger starts sweating and getting visibly worried. . .”I guess I’ll just knock out this one I’m holdin’ so I can fight the clown with both arms. . .”. Bear Hugger goes to bear hug Scarmiglione, but when he goes to do so he says Scarmiglione waving off in the distance. He looks down at who he’s bear hugging to see Pennywise, who yells out “Kiss me, fat boy!” for Bear Hugger to let out a legitimate scream as Pennywise bites into his flesh.

The camera cuts to Hades watching this on his magical television in the underworld, only Bear Hugger’s screams and Pennywise’s chomping being heard. Hades is obviously enjoying it a lot, but his grin fades as he goes to sigh. “Dammit, I’d love to watch this finish, but it’ll end too fast if I just let ‘em kill each other. What fun would that be?”. Hades opens a portal and comes out of it next to the group of characters, hurling a fireball at Pennywise which he hastily dodges and further bludgeons Bear Hugger. Hades cringes as he looks at Bear Hugger’s corpse, causing him to sigh before he zaps it with magic, healing him enough to regain consciousness. Hades turns to the rest of the characters and frowns. “I gave you two simple rules. Just two. Don’t try to escape and don’t kill the other competitions. You still in pre-school? Dunno how to count? Not even to two?”.

Scarmiglione retorts Hades. “Come now. . .You brought us here for entertainment. Ssssurely this is plenty entertaining? You –are- a lord of the dead.”.

“So I am, so I am. Glad you were paying at least –some- attention. . .But if I just wanted you to tear each other apart I would’ve, y’know, told you. I’ve done that plenty of times before. It gets old, y’know? If you wanna kill the others so bad, vote ‘em off. I catch you guys doin’ this again, and I won’t be so nice.”.

Scarmiglione nods. “Undersssstood. Eh. . .He doesn’t seem that bad. How mad could he get?”.

Jason continues mindlessly slashing away at Potato Head, ignoring everything Hades said. Hades just stares blankly at Jason. “Really? This is what luck of the draw brings me? Somebody with such a severe case of ADD he ignores death threats?”.

Scarmiglione nods. “Yessssss. . .He is rather. . .Sssssspecial. . .We promisssse to take care of him.”.

Hades squints at Scarmiglione. “Good. If he tries to kill anybody else, I’ll be holding you two responsible for it. Kapeesh?”.

Scarmiglione just sighs before very reluctantly nodding, then Hades leaves back through a portal. Pennywise comes up to Scarmiglione and smacks him across the face. “What the hell’d you do that for?!? We can’t constantly keep that idiot on a leash!”.

Scarmiglione shrugs. “How was I ssssssupposed to know he’d punish us in his place?!?”.

“Whatever. The easy solution is to just vote him off so we don’t have to take the risk.”. Pennywise turns to Potato Head and Bear Hugger. “How’s that for an apology? We’ll vote off one of our own, and you two can feel free to join us.”.

Potato Head, who is weakly gathering up his pieces and putting them back into place, just nods. “I was gonna vote for him specifically anyway after that, hands down.”.

Bear Hugger folds his arms. “I’m gonna vote for you, clown! You almost killed me. . .And you clowns always scared me at the fair as a kid.”.

“Fine, fine. I understand. You’re mad. Would ya let bygones be bygones if I offered you a way outta here, though?”.

“. . .Eh, I’d consider it.”.

Pennywise claps his hands before a gigantic pile of balloons come up from the hole in the ground. He goes to grab onto the string and starts floating up. “C’mon, grab a balloon! Down here, everything floats!”.

Scarmiglione and Jason go to grab a balloon with little question, though Potato Head and Bear Hugger hesitate to do so. Bear Hugger is too heavy for a balloon to carry him, though, and thus grabs onto 5 balloons before he finally starts floating. Some Boos gather around the hole where the charges are about to come out, look at each other, and chuckle, before blowing upwards once the characters come out to blow them high up into the air, causing Potato Head to shriek and Scarmiglione to cling on for dear life to his balloon. The boos chuckle some more and wave off to the characters as they float, while Pennywise just laughs maniacally.


Level 5
Play as: Pennywise, Scarmiglione, Jason Voorhees, Bear Hugger, Mr. Potato Head
Stocck: 3

This levels involves you floating up higher and higher through the haunted house up through the floors. You can only use aerials and specials in this level due to constantly being in the air, but your Up Special doesn’t put you into helpless and stall then fall moves only last for around .15 seconds. The main threat to you in this level is the fact that if your balloon is hit it pops, causing you to die as you fall off the bottom blast zone. Bear Hugger gets 5 balloons, so he has a slight advantage, but each balloon he loses makes him raise less quickly, and with 2 balloons he’ll ultimately be descending. Once you get to the top of the mansion, a gigantic fan will be there to greet you and pop your balloon, causing you to fall back down through the level. Ultimately you have to land in one of a few select spots, but there are arrows and such pointing you where to go. . .Of course, the Boos tend to guard those areas.


The characters fall onto a cushioned couch fairly comfortably, one after the other. Potato Head and Scarmiglione let out sighs of relief, but they flee in panic (Along with Pennywise) once Bear Hugger comes down. Jason is too stupid to get off the couch, though, and ends up getting crushed by Bear Hugger. Jason barely keeps his consciousness in-tact and reaches out for Bear Hugger with hatred in his eyes, but then passes out. Scarmiglione squints at Bear Hugger. “I know how he feels. . .I’m not gonna vote the poor guy off. The clown doesn’t have to know, but I’m voting for that tub of lard. . .”.

Bear Hugger dusts himself off and smiles, then motions for the team to come after him as he heads off. “C’mon! We’ve gotta figure out where those other guys ended up.”.

Potato Head groans. “Or better yet, find a way outta this dump.”.

Potato Head and Pennywise go along with Bear Hugger, not caring about Jason, but Scarmiglione sighs and goes to drag him along. The screen fades out and back in as they make their way to the dining hall where Hannibal, Q, and Cranky are, Jason’s head getting bumped along mass shit on the ground as Scarmiglione struggles to drag him along. Q glares at Hannibal and Cranky, who are weakly struggling to get up. “Weak.”.

Scarmiglione squints at Q. “You’ve called just about everybody weak by now. If we’re all weak, then who isn’t weak?”.

Q turns away from the group of characters. “I am. . .”.

Cranky goes to start a rant. “Go figure. You youngin’s are always so full of yourself. Back in-“.

Q finishes his sentence before Cranky can truly rant. “Abomination.”.

Cranky stops ranting, dumbfounded at this. “. . .Didn’t see that coming.”.

Suddenly, a gigantic fat ghost comes into the room, drooling and ready to feast. He looks at the table, though, and is very angry that a lot of the food’s already been eaten, glaring at Hannibal and Cranky Kong primairily, who are still rather messy from having eaten some of the food. The ghost pounds his belly in anger and hurls out a meteor at the group before a boss fight starts. . .



Stamina: 500
Play as: Hannibal Bean, Cranky Kong, Q, Mr. Potato Head, Bear Hugger, Jason Voorhees, Pennywise, Scarmiglione
Stock: 4

This fight takes place in the same room where you had to fight Hannibal and Cranky as Q, meaning there’s a gigantic table platform in the middle with food on it you can eat. If you try to eat any of the food, though, Luggs will go into a rage and spam Comet Belch en mass.


Comet Belch: Luggs vomits up a flaming meteor at you the size of Wario, dealing 15% and knockback that kills at 80%. It’s a fairly easily dodged attack, but if you eat any of the food on the table he’ll spam this attack up to 20 times in very quick succession based off how little health he has left. Dodging them in one spot is impossible, meaning you’ll have to constantly run. If you reach theh end of the stage and he’s still vomiting, though, dodging the comets becomes very problematic. These comets burn through the sides of the table, so don’t think you can hide up against the table.

Inhale: Luggs turns to face the camera and inhales. If he sucks you up, he spits you up off the top of the screen for 35% and knockback that kills at 60%. Thankfully, running against the pull is pretty easy to do and thus you can avoid Luggs with little problem, but the catch is he’ll suck up all the food on the table, healing himself. There’s a good bit of starting lag to this attack, so when you see the telegraph for the move go to eat as much food as you can to steal some of the healing from him. There’s enough food on the table at the start to heal up to 100%.

Ectoplasm: Luggs puke up some ectoplasm at you. Luggs can only use this move after he’s eaten some food – he can use it up to 10 times in quick succession if he ate a full table full of food, but he can fire one less projectile for every 10% worth of food he didn’t eat. If he hits you with one of these projectiles, you’ll be stuck in in the gooey puke in a grab hitbox, and Luggs will proceed to spam Comet Belch at you until you escape with you unable to move. While you can dodge all of these projectiles fairly easily, once they land they form a gooey trap that lasts for 10 seconds as wide as Wario, and if you step in it your feet get caught in it. Having to constantly jump when running across the stage to avoid these can be very difficult, especially if you’re in a rush to avoid some Comet Belch spam from Luggs after you tried to steal some of his food.

Waiter Ghosts: After Luggs inhales all of the food on the table, Waiter Ghosts will keep coming until they bring enough food to heal 100%. It takes 20 seconds for them to fully refill the table, and if you hit them they’ll instantly die along with their food. Of course, hitting the waiters also pisses Luggs off and causes him to spam Comet Belch as if you ate some of his food.

Scalding Breath: Luggs hovers over to the side of the screen and inhales slightly for some telegraphed starting lag, then exhales a gigantic cone of bad breath that will easily blow you off the side blast zone if you’re at the same height as he is. During the starting lag Luggs levitates up and down to get at the same vertical position as you, and if you hide next to the table the wind effect just goes under it. It’s fairly easy to avoid. . .But if he breathes the bad breath on the food, then it becomes unedible to you, causing you to take half a second of stun and 5% when eating.

Ghostly Hand: Luggs approaches you, ghosting through the table to get close enough to you if necessary, then ghosts his hand through your belly and pulls out any food you’ve eaten, then eats it himself. This heals him for the same value as the food you’ve eaten while hurting you for half as much as the food healed. Luggs rarely attempts this attack at random, and usually goes for it after you get stuck in some Ectoplasm.

Possession: Luggs possesses the table and causes it to float upwards. If you don’t get on the table, you’ll die, as the stage scrolls upwards far enough to create a bottom blast zone and make the table the only solid ground. Once up here, Luggs will tilt the table back and forth, causing any Ectoplasm on the table to slide to and fro (He’ll only do this if there is ectoplasm on the table) and quite possibly hit you. It also causes any food on the table to slide off, but Luggs typically only uses this attack after he’s done some inhaling. Luggs also sometimes entirely rotates the table – if you’re standing on the table when this happens, you’ll get KO’d. When the attack ends Luggs leaves the table as the screen scrolls downwards to the normal position.

Belly Trampoline: Once Luggs has eaten 200% worth of food, he will be fat enough in order to use this attack. He uses it at the end of the Possession attack when the table falls back down to the ground, and goes to catch you with his belly to bounce you back up. He’ll keep catching you forever until you deal at least 25% to him, after which he gets knocked downwards. . .But you take double the knockback of the attack you hit him with upwards, so you have to just poke Luggs with repeated light attacks before he finally lets you down if you don’t want him to kill you.


Luggs keels over in exhaustion, drooling. He reaches forward weakly towards a gigantic bowl of spaghetti, but is too weak to do so. Bear Hugger rubs his hands together eagerly. “Now that the ghost is down, let’s have a feast, eh?”. Bear Hugger goes towards the table once again, but Luggs vomits a gigantic mess of ectoplasm over the table, ruining all the food before he poofs out of existence. Bear Hugger cringes and looks grossed out at this, while Hannibal just rolls his eyes. “Go figure.”.

Scarmiglione approaches the table and sniffs it briefly before taking a sample of the ectoplasm, then suddenly begins feasting upon it. “What’re you lot waiting for? Join me! This is delicioussssss!”.

Most of the cast looks at least slightly grossed out at this, even Pennywise, who nervously chuckles. “Eh, don’t worry, Scar. I’m full after having fed on fat boy over here.”. Pennywise chuckles more legitimately as he turns to Bear Hugger, who just glares back at him and squints.

Scarmiglione shrugs as he continues feasting. “More for me, then. . .”.

Suddenly, a portal opens up as Hades comes out of it, clapping sarcastically. “Good job, you guys! You managed to beat that overweight ghost in a eight on one fight! You should be –so- proud!”.

Hannibal is annoyed by this. “As if I’d need the help of these. . .Errr. . .People to actually kill that thing. Is that the best you’ve got?”.

Hades chuckles. “Oh don’t worry. . .If you thought that was too easy, the main challenge of the day is right around the corner.”. Hades goes back into the portal, then the portal sucks the eight characters of the group behind him. After the portal closes, Pain wanders into the room and looks around for the group, scratching his head, before the portal re-opens as Hades’ arm comes out and grabs Pain, sucking him through.


Duke Oliver
Von Kaiser
Rocket Executive Hugo
Miles Edgeworth

The group of characters, along with Panic, are spit out of the portal outside the haunted house we’ve already become familiar with. The characters look around at their new location and start to take it in. Edgeworth gets up hastily and dusts off his suit before immediately turning to Panic and pointing a finger at him. “You there! You’re with that lord of the dead figure who sent us here, correct?”.

Panic is taken aback slightly by Edgeworth. “Uhhhh. . .Yeah. Why?”.

“I demand to know under what grounds you’ve brought us here to play this so-called –game-. This is illegal under so many different-”.

Pain interrupts, laughing at Edgeworth. “You heard him, didn’t you? You must’ve, you called him by his title. . .He’s the lord of the dead. He’s way, way, WAAAAAAY above any shitty laws you have. He doesn’t have to give in to any petty demands you have. He’ll be your judge, jury, and executioner.”.

Edgeworth twitches. “. . .But. . .How is this possible. . .?”.

Panic chuckles and smacks his own head in before it reforms. “How is that possible? Not everything needs a damn explanation.”.

Edgeworth twitches some more as he realizes his prosecuting skills are largely useless. We cut over to Spadefox, who has gone off by himself and is repeatedly trying to open portals and failing at it, mumbling to himself in annoyance. Panic chuckles. “You didn’t think those portals would actually work, did you?”.

Spadefox hastily comes up to Panic and grabs him, strangling him as he does so. “You’re with the “host” of this pathetic little game. Get me out of here this instant if you want to live.”.

Panic laughs maniacally as he gets strangled. “You think you can kill me? You can’t make me send you back, and unless my master wills it you’ll be stuck here until our little game is over.”.

Panic chuckles some more before Spadefox drops him and chops up into itty bitty pieces with his scythe, but Panic just reforms. Spadefox grins. “The fact you can’t die means I can inflict all the more pain on you if you refuse to get me out of here. . .”.

Panic gulps and chuckles nervously before looking up at the sky. “Eh, boss? Can I get a little help convincing this guy here?”.

A portal opens up right on que, and Hades’ upper torso pops out of it. He glares at Spadefox menacingly. “Alright, pal. I didn’t wanna have to do this. . .But seeing you need a demonstration of my power, I’ll give you a little taste so you actually play the game the way it’s meant to be played.”. Hades charges up a huge fireball, while Spadefox goes to throw his scythe at Hades. Hades throws the fireball through the fireball at the scythe which deflects it. . .Then it hits Panic and causes him to disintegrate so horribly he doesn’t immediately regenerate. Hades leaves through the portal again.

Von Kaiser comes up to Spadefox and taps him on the shoulder, clearly very intimidated. “I say we don’t question him. . .”.

Spadefox shrugs Von Kaiser’s hand off his shoulder before walking off and facepalming. “How did I get brought into this? How did I fall victim to something so pathetic? How am I stuck with these. . .IDIOTS?!?”.

Hugo clearly isn’t particularly happy about the remark. “You –do- know we’re right here, don’t ya?”.

“And your point is. . .?”.

Hugo smirks and chuckles subtly. “Alright, guys. You heard that “lord of the dead”. Once the day ends, we get to vote somebody off. Let’s make sure this asshole is the first.”.

Spadefox stares at Hugo in disbelief before just going off to walk into the distance, muttering something or other, before Omi comes up and nods in agreeance. “Agreed! Anybody who would insult my intelligence isn’t too light themselves!”.

Pegasus chuckles. “I believe the correct term is -isn’t too bright-, my boy. . .”.

“That too! Now then, seeing I will clearly be the winner of this game, I shall take my rightful place as our leader.”.

Hugo stares blankly at Omi. “Yeeeeeeeeeeeeah. The hell with that cat guy. I want this stupid brat dead as soon as goddamn possible.”.

Edgeworth shakes his head. “You can’t just come up and claim leadership. I propose we have a vote as to who our leader shall be.”.

Omi shakes his head. “A vote? We’ll all be doomed if we leave it to such things as opinion. If you think you can contest my leadership, let us have a proper Xialoin Showdown to determine who the leader shall be!”.

Omi strikes a fighting pose, while Edgeworth backs away nervously. “Determining leadership over a fight? I can’t believe you’d consider such a barbaric solution. . .Besides, a leader doesn’t need these sorts of things, they need proper leadership skills in order to figure out how to maximize everyone’s efficiency in order to-”.

Omi interrupts. “Blah blah blah, too many words. How can you be a leader if you are always talking?”.

Pegasus intervenes. “At this point it is much too early to determine a leader. Why don’t we just wait a couple of days so we can make an educated decision?”.

Omi facepalms. “Do you really think you can last a whole day in a place like this without my leadership?”. Omi goes to leave. “Let’s see how you do without me then! By the time this day is over, you shall be coming back to me faster than you can say Ninja Bread Men!”.

Pegasus and Hugo chuckle at Omi, Hugo especially. “Hopefully that cocky brat’ll die out there by himself. . .”.

Edgeworth still looks rather unnerved about the whole thing. Oliver comes over to Edgeworth and pats him on the back. “Don’t worry, you reasoned as best you could. I know you are clearly not used to this sort of thing, but I will ensure our stay together will be most pleasant, my beautiful angel.”.

Edgeworth recoils away subtly from Oliver. “I am. . .Errr. . .Most thankful. . .”.

Oliver turns towards the haunted house and motions off to it. “Let’s be off to the house to see what we can find. I grow weary of being out in this atmosphere – hopefully there is a nice bed for us waiting inside.”.

Oliver heads up towards the house while the others (After some reluctance) follow him. They attempt to enter the house, but it’s locked. Hugo grins. “Guess it’s time to show you guys what I’m capable of.”. Hugo sends out his Machamp to bust down the door and turns to the others with his arms folded, smirking.

Pegasus shakes his head. “What? You think you’re special because you can summon monsters? You’re not the only one around here, you know. . .”.

Edgeworth turns to Panic, who has finally revived. “These guys get monsters to fight for them despite being unable to fight for themselves – I demand some sort of compensation so that this game can be fai-“.

Panic props himself up against a wall. “What? You expected this game to actually be fair? He picked you all at complete random. Of course it’s gonna be rigged.”.

Panic laughs a bit and Edgeworth goes to protest, but Von Kaiser interrupts him as he notices Machamp still hasn’t busted the door down. “Eheh. . .I say we get out of here. The owners of the mansion probably won’t be too ha-“.

Hugo interrupts. “Owners of the house? Look at this place! It’s abandoned. Ours for the taking.”. He turns to Machamp. “Keep pounding, Machamp!”.

Pegasus shakes his head. “Look at the place. It practically screams “stereotypical haunted house”. I wasn’t particularly sure about coming here in the first place. . .”.

Hugo rolls his eyes. “Oh c’mon. Don’t be superstitious. What’s the worst that could happen?”.

The screen cuts to Haunter, who is inside the Mansion listening to them and chuckling alongside an army of Boos. He motions the Boos inhabiting the mansion to go outside with which they are happy to comply, swarming the group of characters at the entrance. This causes Edgeworth to recoil and gets Von Kaiser to scream out for his mommy.


Level 6
Play as: Miles Edgeworth (No Assistants), Pegasus, Rocket Executive Hugo, Von Kaiser, Duke Oliver
Stock: 3

This is somewhat of a chase level, with an army of Boos at the right side of the screen as you progress to the left to try to escape them. Raticate will unfortunately mindlessly approach the Boos and is rather useless, but Machamp has the intelligence to turn around when he comes in contact with the Boos. What prevents it from being a blatant chase level is that if you face the Boos they’ll behave like normal Boos, covering their faces and stopping in place. This gives Hugo some form of advantage, as so long is at least one Pokemon faces them they won’t chase after you. This means if you constantly face the characters and jump backwards, you can progress through the level without having to worry about them at all. They move faster than you, so this is ultimately mandatory, but if you just do it the whole level you’ll be unable to hit all of the other foes due to constantly jumping up in the air to move backwards, considering the other enemies are fairly small and low to the ground.


The characters are seen hiding behind a gigantic tombstone while some Boos cluelessly look about for them. Von Kaiser is seen sucking his thumb and shivering in fear, causing Hugo to smack him. “Be quiet or they’ll find us, you idiot!”. Hugo talks too loudly and causes the group of nearby Boos to find them, however, causing Pegasus and Edgeworth to glare at Hugo angrily before Hugo chuckles nervously. Hugo sends out all of his Pokemon and Pegasus sends out some of his monsters from his duel disk to fend them off, then they go to run off.

Hugo chuckles. “Well, uhhh. . .That didn’t end up –that- bad. We managed to take out that group.”.

Pegasus folds his arms. “Just be glad that the groups split up to look for us. Imagine if all of them came onto us at once!”.

Hugo goes to protest but Duke Oliver interrupts him. “Stop trying to defend yourself for your unforgivable actions! You are common filth who shall never be as graceful as we!”. Oliver spreads his arms wide to motion to Edgeworth and Pegasus, causing Edgeworth to recoil again and Hugo to stare blankly before shaking his head.

We cut to Haunter, who is busy ordering around groups of Boos to look for the group. The Boos come back to Haunter and shrug innocently, unable to find him, causing Haunter to facepalm and squint in annoyance, motioning back out for them to go look some more. The boos put their hands on their “hips” and shake their heads no, then go to leave. Haunter repeatedly points back to where the group fled off to, but gets entirely annoyed, one of the Boos abandoning him turning around to stick his tongue out at him. Haunter facepalms more blatantly, wiping his hand over his face before shaking his head. He folds his “arms” and enters a thinking pose before sighing and going to look for the other characters himself. The screen fades out and back in to show Haunter having found the group of characters and laughing to himself, covering up his laughter with his hand so as not to alert them to his presence. . .


Level 7
Play as: Haunter
Stock: 7

That’s a lot of stocks for this level, eh? Well, you’re gonna need ‘em. Haunter starts the level in the background as the group of characters progress through the level – though the level is a endless loop unlike the levels where you’re trying to sneak up on people as Pennywise or Scarmiglione. Your goal is to use your Neutral Special followed by your grab to bring one foe into the background at a time and kill them before repeating it for all five characters, but you can only stay in the background for up to 7 seconds, meaning you have to find somewhere in the main plane to hide every so often and do a 4 on 1 or so. So long as you’re behind a solid wall, you’re good, and you can make them forget about you the moment you go back into the background. The only particularly difficult thing about this is that after you grab somebody and pull them into the background, you have to wait for the main group of characters to leave before you can just fight the character in the background from the main plane where you can’t be hit, so Haunter will essentially just be fleeing for a couple seconds.


Kaiser is seen running away as fast as he possibly can when Haunter pops up in front of him and makes a scary face, stretching his eyes out and waggling his gigantic tongue about. Kaiser shrieks and goes to run the other way, but Haunter has already moved there and does another scary face. The process repeats twice more before Kaiser looks ready to faint, then Oliver arrives and grabs Haunter by the tongue (The one physical part of his body) and swings him around before throwing him away. The other characters arrive after Oliver, Hugo somewhat pissed. “Oh ‘cmon! I wanted to capture him!”.

Pegasus raises an eyebrow. “How would you capture it if it could just phase through anything you contained it in?”.

“. . .It’s a Pokemon, like my Machamp. Pokemon can be contained in these balls. . .”. Hugo picks up one of his Pokeballs and shows them to Pegasus.

Oliver folds his arms. “Pfft. As if I would trust a common ruffian like you to do such a thing when my beautiful angels were in danger!”.

Edgeworth twitches slightly. “For the love of god, will you please stop-“.

Edgeworth gets interrupted as Haunter comes in and licks him from behind, causing him to become temporairily paralyzed and fall over. Kaiser goes to run while Hugo and Pegasus go to summon their monsters, but Haunter pressures them before they can release them. Oliver puts up his fists, but Haunter smacks Oliver in the nose. “What have you done to my beautiful, beautiful nose?!?”. Haunter laughs at the group of characters before Omi appears and does a flying kick through the air aimed directly at Haunter. . .


Omi Vs. Haunter
Stock: 1 Vs. 1

A fairly simple Brawl. The only real thing coming in to shake things up is that sometimes Haunter will summon Boos to aid him while he’s chilling in the background, and said Boos can cover up Haunter’s end lag when he exits and enters the background quite well.


Omi knocks Haunter to the ground, causing him to writhe in pain. He casually dusts himself off and turns to the rest of the characters who go to get up. “See? I told you that you were all hopelessly lost without my leadership! Now elect me your leader before something even worse happens!”.

Hugo spits at Omi. “Don’t try to play the hero. We weakened him for you a whole hell of a lot, and he was always getting the jump on us to hit us by surprise.”.

“Is that so? Then how come when I arrived here you all had him surrounded yet couldn’t do a thing? You are all woof and no bite!”.

Pegasus goes to correct Omi, but Hugo shakes his head. “Don’t even bother.”.

Omi puts his hands on his hips. “So, are you going to make me your leader or are you going to make me your leader?”.

Hugo smirks. “How about the third choice? We kick you out of the goddamn group.”.

Edgeworth ponders this briefly. “I’m not sure if that’d be the best idea. . .Obviously we shouldn’t make him our leader, but he was quite useful there admittedly. I propose we stick with the first plan of voting out that black fox creature. He’s just gone off by himself and done nothing.”.

Pegasus shakes his head. “You haven’t been observant enough for someone who claims to be so well read in law. Do you not remember when we were first brought here? This ghost counts as a member of the group. . .”.

Von Kaiser twitches. “So. . .You’re telling me that we’re going to be stuck with that ghost for the whole time we play this game? I don’t think I could possibly survive another day with that. . .That. . .”. Kaiser cringes. “Thing!”.

“Which is precisely why we vote him off, so we don’t have to. All in favor?”.

Kaiser and Edgeworth raise their hands, while Pegasus rolls his eyes. “Oh come on, you lot. Why won’t you vote them off?”.

Oliver folds his arms. “Forget the ghost. I simply cannot stand to be in the company of this common peasant!”. Oliver motions off to Hugo dismissively.

Omi nods in agreement. “Yes, this “pheasant”, as you call him, has much too much of an ego for his own good! He actually thinks he is stronger and could be a better leader than me!”.

Hugo stares blankly at Oliver and Omi. “. . .Yeah. Do I need to say why? I have bigger fish to fry than that ghost.”.

Pegasus sighs. “Fine, fine. We still have a majority to get rid of this ghost. . .”.

Haunter chuckles and gets up, then cackles madly as if having heard the conversation. He goes over to Oliver and Omi and puts his arms around them, then points to Hugo.

Kaiser seems terrified again the moment Haunter starts moving again. “You had to jynx it, didn’t you?”.

Hugo smirks and looks Haunter in the eyes. “Not a smart decision you made to reveal your plan. Now that I know you’re another enemy, I can just join these guys in voting you off. You’ve just screwed yourself over. Congrats. Four votes to three.”.

Haunter folds his “arms” and squints at Hugo, then goes to leave the group again, sighing once out of sight. Omi clears his throat. “So then, to be getting on the back of the topic. . .Any objections to my being leader?”.

Oliver shakes his head. “Though a brave warrior you are, we need more time before we can properly pick a leader, and there is no need for leadership at this early stage of the game. We can all consider ourselves equals what with out astounding beauty!”. Oliver lifts his arms up gloriously before his smile instantly turns to a frown and his arms lower down, then he points off to Kaiser and Hugo. “Except you two peasants.”.

Hugo twitches. “Dammit, what’d I ever do to piss you off so much?”.

“You came to us rich men in hopes of leeching off of our wealth, peasant! Had you stayed in your shanty town made of dirt by your bare ugly hands, we would’ve had an agreement. . .”. Oliver places his hand over himself his chest. “Though then again, I cannot blame you for envying my beauty and wanting to take some for yourself. . .Buy it is still no excuse!”.

“. . .Yeah. I wanna stay as far the fuck away as possible from you. I wasn’t brought here by choi-“


“Y’know what? I’ve had it with you, dammit.”. Hugo turns to the rest of the group. “You can either come with me or stay with him. It’s your damn choice, but if you think that fat dickwad is gonna help you more than my monsters, you’re retarded.”.

Kaiser goes over to Hugo’s side with no hesitation. “I’m not a damn peasant! I’m a veteran from the second World War, dammit, and I want some respect for it.”.

Edgeworth turns to Pegasus. “He –does- make a good point. . .”.

Pegasus sighs before advancing to Hugo’s side, with Edgeworth quick to follow when being left all alone with Oliver. “Glad to be rid of this buffoon I suppose. . .What the devil does he mean when he calls me an angel?”.

Pegasus turns back to Oliver. “I am sorry for this, but majority –does- rule. . .”.

Oliver sighs. “I can’t believe angels such as you would let peasants such as them taint your magnificent beauty. . .But I suppose it cannot be helped.”. Oliver turns to Omi. “You, boy! Let us go out on our own, before the aura of those peasants rubs off on us.”.

Omi nods. “Agreed! If they shall not let me be their leader, then they do not deserve to have my presence rub off on them.”.

Omi and Oliver walk off into the distance together before Oliver looks. . .Awkwardly at Omi. “Then I suppose it’s okay if it rubs off on me then?”.
“Only if you accept me as your leader!”.

“I’d gladly accept you as my leader in order to be able to rub off some of your beauty. . .”.

Oliver goes to rub Omi’s gigantic head before Omi recoils away from Oliver. “Not that sort of rubbing!”. Oliver sighs before retracting his hand.


We cut to Spadefox, who is pacing through a cemetery, deep in thought. “I have to come up with some way to get out of this place as soon as possible. . .I obviously can’t kill that lord of the dead, much less considering he’s an undead. He’d just revive. . .I can’t use a portal to exit this place. If I try to wander too far away from the rest of the group or escape on foot, he’ll just send me back to the others. . .He did say he expected us all to die very quickly and that could be a way to end the game faster, but if I kill them I’ll be disqualified, apparently. . .It’s quite the conundrum. However; if I don’t –technically- kill them, then I’m innocent, am I not? I’ll just raise the corpses in this graveyard before I unleash them on those other fools.”. Spadefox cackles maniacally before going to dig up a grave and animates up the skeleton within it. . .


Level 8
Play as: Spadefox, Haunter
Stock: 2

Most of the level involves you playing as Spadefox and using your Down Special in front of graves to raise zombies with only 1 stock. The problem with these zombies is that they are still hostile to you. . .You can poke them away to make it easier to raise another zombie, but due to their slow movement speed you’ll mostly just be luring them away from graves with zombies you need to animate. You –can- kill some of them if you get pressured, but you’re required to animate 80% of the zombies in order to clear the level.

Once you clear this part of the level, a cutscene occurs showing Spadefox going up onto a pedestal higher than where the zombies can reach him. He then starts channeling an animation spell with a gigantic area of effect, causing zombies all around the area to start rising from their graves. As he does this, though, the zombies already animated constantly attack the pedestal he’s standing on, causing it to start to crumble and Spadefox to look downwards and curse to himself. The camera pans off into the distance to show Haunter watching all of this, causing him to rub his hands together and cackle evily. . .From here, the gameplay starts back up again with you as Haunter with a single stock, and you must defend Spadefox as he channels the spell. The pillar he’s standing on has 50 stamina, and if he gets knocked off of it any attack will cancel the summoning. You must distract/repel the zombies for 5 minutes before Spadefox can complete the channeling.


We cut back to Hugo’s group, who is going through the graveyard warily. Edgeworth folds his arms. “What are we even looking for out here anyway? Why can’t we just stay back and rest? This is exhausting. . .”.

Hugo sighs. “Did you not see what happened when we stayed in one place for too long? The ghosts’ll just gather up around us and kill us all.”.

At this, Von Kaiser starts walking slightly more quickly. “Eheh heh. . .Yeah. Let’s keep moving.”.

Hugo raises his voice enough to talk to the group as a whole. “Soooooo. . .You guys willing to join me in voting off that fat dickwad who’s obviously gay for you after we vote off the ghost?”.

Pegasus folds his arms. “That insult was uncalled for.”.

“What? You don’t think he’s gay? How much more blatant do you want it to be?”. Hugo flaps his wings and starts imitating Oliver in a stupid voice. “Let us fly away into the sunset like angels, my beauties!”.

Pegasus shakes his head at this while Edgeworth twitches slightly at this – the obvious seems to of finally clicked in his mind. “I’ll have to. . .Keep my distance from that man. . .”.

Hugo turns to Edgeworth and Kaiser. “Oh c’mon. What about you two? You’ll help me vote him off, right?”.

Edgeworth nods reluctantly, not wanting to realize he was so daft, while Kaiser nods in agreement heartily. “Definitely. He’s got no respect for the people who fought for him in the wars while he sat in his mansion eating one too many chicken legs.”.

Hugo turns to Pegasus. “And why won’t you, huh?”.

Pegasus sighs. “I don’t really have much of a reason. . .I just want to wait and see what happens. Really, it’s too early to decide who we’ll vote off after we get rid of that damn ghost. It may very well be him, but I think the best choice would probably be for that black fox creature. God knows what he’s doing right now, but whatever it is it’s not helping us.”.

Edgeworth looks as if thinking. “That man –is- rather disturbing, but the wolf man could potentially be a legitimate threat. . .I suppose that could be a decent proposal. But again, as you said, let’s see what he does before we just vote him off. For all we know, he may be finding us a way out of this mess, what with how determined he was to find some loophole in the rules the undead lord set for us in this game.”.

“Indeed. Decisions, decisions. . .This is precisely why we can’t be too hasty in deciding our course of action.”.

Hugo groans. “Fine, fine. We don’t have to decide who we vote off after the ghost yet. . .But if we had to vote right now, who would you vote for? Of course in the days to come there’ll be stuff to change our minds otherwise, but what about for right now?”.

“Does it matter? We’re voting off the ghost first, then after that inevitably something will happen to alter the variables.”.

“Guess I see your point. . .”. Hugo turns away from Pegasus and grits his teeth as he continues leading the group. “I smell bullshit. He’s obviously gonna betray me, and then the four to three majority with me versus the ghost flips the other way around. Could just be being paranoid. . .But just to be safe, I needa get to this black fox or wolf or whatever and convince him to vote for that damn ghost instead of me. Hopefully they haven’t gotten to him already and converted him to their side. . .”.

Suddenly, corpses rise up from the graves around the characters. Von Kaiser leaps up into Edgeworth’s arms in fear and screams, while Edgeworth isn’t able to support Kaiser’s weight and drops him to the floor. Kaiser crawls backwards in horror on the ground, causing Edgeworth to topple over. Pegasus ignores this and summons his monsters from his duel disk while Hugo just stares at this with a blank expression. “Really?”. Hugo rolls his eyes before going to send out his Pokemon. . .


Level 9
Play as: Rocket Executive Hugo, Pegasus, Miles Edgeworth (No assistants), Von Kaiser
Stock: 4

This level has a lot of battles in it against zombies where you’re not allowed to progress until all the zombies are dead. . .The problem is that more zombies keep coming out in the middle of the battle and there’s no limit to how many can be out at once. You can lure the zombies back into their graves, though, and they’re too stupid to jump out of them. In addition, if a zombie is in the pit no more zombies can spawn from within that pit. During the time it takes to lure a slow moving zombie back into one of their pits, though, one will probably spawn from it. Fun fun! Hugo in particular has lots of fun what with being unable to lure zombies, though he can hit multiple zombies at once if nothing else and can block off zombies he doesn’t want to fight yet with Hypno’s Barriers.


We cut to Duke Oliver and Omi walking through the cemetery together, Oliver struggling to keep up with Omi, much to Omi’s annoyance. “Come, come you pool of lard! I could not walk slower than you if I tried!”.

Oliver huffs and puffs as he comes after Omi before chuckling slightly. “I couldn’t be faster than someone as beautiful as you if I tried, my dear boy. I’m not slow, you’re just fast.”.

Omi smirks, enjoying Oliver stroking his ego. “Well, I –am- the fastest of the Xiaolin warriors and am clearly going to become their leader. . .It is only natural that I become leader of this group!”.

Oliver nods. “Indeed! I don’t see how the others cannot see how you have such grace, such beauty. . .It’s practically angelic!”.

“Well, I am mainly skilled in combat. . .But I have looks too! Nobody can ever best me in anything, not even not being the best!”.

“I know, my boy, I know. I just wonder how we’ll be able to convince the others to see that. . .”.

“Well, obviously that one who sends the monsters out of the balls to fight for him will never learn. How can he appreciate true fighting mastery when he does no fighting himself?”.

“Very true, but why would we want that man to join us anyway? He’s a mere peasant – I only want those other two lords to accompany us on our path to victory.”.

Before any more conversing can occur, zombies start coming up out of their graves, causing Omi to enter a fighting stance and start beating up on them. Oliver looks off into the distance and sees Spadefox up on his pedestal with Haunter circling around him, then points Omi off to it. “Do you not see, my dear boy? That is clearly the source of these abominations!”.

Omi nods. “Very well, but first let us deal with those before us!”.


Level 10
Play as: Omi, Duke Oliver
Stock: 3

The first part of the level is similar to what you just did as Hugo’s group, but this part of the level is half as long as level 9.

After you complete this much of the level, a cutscene occurs of Omi trying to do a wall run up the pedestal to reach Spadefox. Spadefox looks downwards at Omi as he channels and calls out to Haunter. “Quickly, dispose of this child before he interrupts the summoning!”. Haunter quickly complies and swats Omi down. Omi just goes to attempt it again, but Haunter just laughs and licks Omi’s bald head, paralyzing him temporairily and causing him to fall straight down again with a thud.

Omi goes to attempt to reach him again, but Oliver puts a hand on his shoulder to stop him. “This clearly isn’t working. Have you any other ways to reach him? Surely a warrior of your skill must know how. . .”.

Omi thinks briefly before a light bulb appears above his head and he takes out of the Orb of Tsunami, calling out its’ name as water starts gushing out of it. “Just defend me while the water rises up so we can reach him. We shall stop him before he even knows what kicked him!”.

The gameplay resumes here, with you playing as Oliver if you weren’t already and Omi channeling with the Orb of Tsunami. Of course, this will get almost instantly interrupted, though no matter what you do, most probably by Haunter. Omi must channel the Orb of Tsunami for 3 seconds before the water level rises enough to hit Spadefox and allow you to clear the level. When Omi’s not channeling, a red arrow points to the point where Omi was channeling the spot initially, and if you head to this spot and press B then Omi will start channeling the Orb of tsunami again. This works even if you’re playing Oliver as it causes Omi to materialize out of nothing to start channeling, and if playing Omi Omi your damage percentage will transfer over to Oliver as Omi starts channeling and Oliver materalizes. If you start it up as Omi, using the Orb of Tsunami anywhere will allow you to start channeling it at that spot and will make it the new spot where you start channeling by default.

Obviously the main thing you have to do in order to channel this long is to kill off Haunter, but Haunter respawns after a mere 5 seconds once killed and the zombies are still relentless in quantity. As Oliver you can lure the zombies away from Omi for 3 seconds easily enough, even if you have to take a lot of damage doing it, but Haunter isn’t that stupid and will go straight for Omi.


Omi smacks Spadefox off the pedestal and the water drowns all of the zombies, who are much too stupid to know how to swim. Spadefox sprouts wings and flies up to avoid being dunked in the water, causing Oliver to stare up at Spadefox in awe. “My god, those wings. . .You truly are an angel!”.

Spadefox squints. “More like a fallen angel.”.

“Even so, you are still an angel, your beauty is unparalleled!”.

Spadefox stares blankly at Oliver. “Are you coming onto me? Really? Try losing a few pounds, for starters, then get rid of that damn facial hair. So unattractive. . .God. . .”.

Oliver folds his arms. “You clearly just do not know true beauty when you see it!”.

Spadefox goes to reply, but gets kicked out of the air and into the water by Omi. The rest of the characters approach from the distance, and the screen zooms in on Von Kaiser’s eyes as he watches Omi kick Spadefox. “If he can stop these zombies, perhaps we –should- be following his leadership. . .”. The screen zooms out to show Von Kaiser’s entire face as he winces after a pause, then a flashback occurs of some kids beating him up in his boxing school. The screen goes back to show his face as his eyes twitches. “Then again. . .”.

The screen zooms out enough to show that Hugo and Kaiser are riding on his Machamp which is swimming through the water while Pegasus and Edgeworth are on the back of Pegasus’ Toon Dragon, Edgeworth very visibly worried and clinging on for dear life. Hugo points forward at Spadefox and Haunter. “So those two were the ones responsible for bringing all those zombies to life?”.

Omi nods. “Indeed, and I was the one to stop them! If not for me, you all would’ve probably died by now! It is undeniable now that you must make me your leader!”.

Before Hugo can bother to retort, Kel’Thuzad floats towards the group from the distance and folds his arms, looking over the group in disgust. “Oh come now! I intended to use this place to animate corpses for my master’s army – I procrastinate on it for a little while, and now when I come back when I actually need the troops you’ve flooded the whole place out? Well. . .Seeing I still need some new recruits for the army, I suppose your corpses shall have to serve as substitutes instead!”.



Play as: Spadefox, Haunter, Omi, Duke Oliver, Rocket Executive Hugo, Von Kaiser, Pegasus, Miles Edgeworth (No assistants)
Stock: 4
Stamina: 300

There are a mere two platforms for you to stand on for this boss fight with the rest of the stage being covered in Melee style water – meaning it’s a bottomless pit and Omi can’t walk on it. Kel’Thuzad’s idle stance has him levitate in-between the two platforms, meaning hitting him is a massive chore as you have to just poke him with an aerial before jumping to the opposite platform, making his 300 stamina much more intimidating then it looks at a glance.


Frost Nova: Kel’Thuzad summons an ice glacier at your current location, which deals 20% and knockback that kills at 50%. This attack has a duration long enough meaning it can’t be spot dodged and is too wide to just casually roll away from, but if you keep moving then it’s easy to avoid. . .Except where there’s no terrain where you can actually avoid this. However, if the Frost Nova connects with the water, it will create an icy platform on the top of the water, giving you more room to work with and a safe place to go back to if you’re too far out to safely recover back to the platform.

Frost Armor: Kel’Thuzad casts Frost Armor on himself, causing all attacks to deal 60% of their normal damage to him and for anybody who hits him to gain a chilled effect for 10 seconds, lowering their attack speed and movement speed by 50%. The catch for this is that while under the chill effect, icy platforms will generate underneath you when walking on water, enabling you to actually make some terrain on the stage. The bad news is that so long as your feet are on the icy terrain, the chill timer increases rather than decreasing. While giving you lots of extra land to work with, this ultimately will eventually force you to stay on the two real platforms for a while – which Frost Nova makes rather difficult, especially while still under the chill effect.

Shadow Blast: Kel’Thuzad shoots two shadowy blasts downwards onto the two main platforms. Kel’Thuzad fires the beams for a long enough period of time that you can’t just stay in the air the whole time, meaning if you don’t have any icy platforms to go to you’re screwed. Kel’Thuzad never uses this attack until he’s used Frost Nova/Frost Armor at least 3 times in total.

Unholy Frenzy: Kel’Thuzad launches a homing projectile at you made of shadowy energy. The projectile is slow enough to typically avoid, but it constantly follows you around with an endless duration, and if you just have a couple of small platforms to avoid the projectile or are chilled it’s almost impossible to not be hit by it at some point. This causes you to take 4% per second for 30 seconds, but also increases your movement and attack rate by 50%. At some points you will want to be hit by this in order to override the chill effect, but 4% per second is a heavy price to pay.

Shadow Beam: There is a significant telegraph to this attack, with Kel’Thuzad glowing with more and more of a shadowy aura until he’s ready to use this attack after 40 seconds. Once he’s ready, Kel’Thuzad fires downwars a gigantic shadowy beam as large as Lucario’s Final Smash, contact with it dealing 35% and knockback that kills at 50%. You have to run across the entire stage to avoid it that well, meaning if you’re anywhere but at the very edge of the stage you’ll eventually run out of room to flee and get killed. Even then, being chilled can also screw you over – this attack is the main reason you want to let yourself be hit by Unholy Frenzy.

Death and Decay: This is an alternative attack Kel’Thuzad can use all of his stored dark energy in instead of the Shadow Beam – it involves Kel’Thuzad channeling a screen filling spell with purple sparkles of death filling the entire screen, dealing 4% to you every half-second. More importantly, if Kel’Thuzad channels for at least 2 seconds he will destroy any and all icy platforms, and if he manages to somehow channel 5 seconds he’ll destroy the main platforms as well. When Kel’Thuzad is ready to unleash all his dark energy, you’ll never know whether to flee to the edge of the stage or to go up to him ready to interrupt him. The next character in line will be able to use the icy platforms though, so perhaps it’d be best to just sacrifice them?

Dark Ritual: When a character dies, Kel’Thuzad can either use this attack or the one below. He uses this attack when his health is low, causing the character’s flesh to get absorbed into his body and heal him of a whopping 100 HP. Yeah, think about sacrificing characters to Kel’Thuzad again. . .

Raise Dead: If Kel’Thuzad still has lots of health, he’ll opt to animate the dead character as a skeleton. Skeletal characters function normally as characters who fight against you, though they lack Specials, and most importantly recoveries – they mindlessly approach you, so it’s easy to lure them into the water. If you have too many icy platforms, though, they could potentially backfire on you, enabling the skeleton to transverse the stage without the Up Special. In addition, Kel’Thuzad will always opt to use Shadow Blast over Death and Decay when he has a skeletal minion fighting for him.


Kel’Thuzad sinks into the water, holding up his hand as if trying to grasp onto something to stop his inevitable fate as he lets out a cry of pain. Omi immediately chuckles and puffs out his chest. “Now that you have seen that it is I who contributed most to that undead’s defeat, it is only fair that-“.

Hugo interrupts. “Yeah yeah, we know. You should be our goddamn leader. . .But if it weren’t for you we wouldn’t be in this mess in the first place. The only reason that guy was such a pain in the ass to finish off was because of all the water you drenched the place with, dammit.”.

Omi goes to protest before Hades comes in through a portal, clapping sarcastically. “Forget about arguing over who failed the most, you all messed up so much in that fight that your levels of failure were all equal. Nobody’s left out!”. Hades chuckles awkwardly which unnerves Von Kaiser and Edgeworth before his face immediately turns back to deadpan. “Now that he’s out of the way, it’s about time you guys had a –real- test. . .”. Hades exits back through the portal, then it gains a suction effect which sucks up all of the characters. The suction continues on for a while after everybody’s sucked up before Panic is sucked up from under the water and the portal finally closes. . .


Hades stands before both groups back in his lair, slicking his hair before resuming his fast talking sleezy used cars salesman persona. “Alright, alright. You’ve gotten to know each other a bit – and by know each other I mean hate each other to death.”. Hades comes up next to Omi, Edgeworth, and Spadefox in the blink of an eye, then motions off to Oliver. “How you enjoyin’ tubby constantly lookin’ at you, y’know, -that- way?”. Before they can even look behind them, Hades is already behind Bear Hugger and Potato Head and points off to Hannibal and Cranky. “How’s about those two guys who left you to rot in the basement?”. Hades points off to Pennywise and Scarmiglione. “And those guys? Don’t even get me started. They tried to freakin’ MURDER ya! They would’ve if I hadn’t stepped in. . .”. Hades goes over to Jason’s side and motions off to Q. “What about him, huh? He called you –weak-. I know that’s a lot of words for you to take in, but even you can understand that’s –completely- unforgivable.”.

Hades goes back over in front of the whole group. “Don’t worry. I know you’ve all made unforgettable bonds with one another, and you’ll get your chance to vote off somebody from your group soon enough. . .But you’ve only met half your fellow players! It’s time to, shall we say, get –acquainted- with the other group. . .”. Hades snaps his fingers, causing a gigantic cage to materialize around all of the characters. “But rather than just chattin’ it up, a fight’s worth a thousand words, wouldn’t ya agree? So I’ve decided to give you all some quality time in the cage in an 8 on 8 battle to the death. . .Or knock out, seeing I still need you all alive for now. Just don’t get no bright ideas about intentionally losing so you can vote off that one guy you hate, see? If I get the slightest idea one of you isn’t trying, I’ll kill them on the spot. Kapeesh?”.

Edgeworth goes to shout out an objection at Hades, but before he can even finish so much as the single word Q does a hasty dashing punch to knock him against the side of the cage. . .


Group Panic Vs. Group Pain
Stock: 4 Vs. 8

There’s not much to say about the brawl other than that you play Group Panic. You still get 8 stocks for a fair match, technically, but you only get to pick four characters to play as. The other four characters will be computer controlled allies to fight alongside you, with the match constantly being in a 2v2 setting until either you lose all of your allies or there’s only one enemy left.


The last member of Group Pain falls to the ground, defeated. Bear Hugger look ready to collapse from exhaustion over the bloody battle, but Jason still keeps mindlessly attacking and cuts into Bear Hugger. Scarmiglione takes Jason’s machete away from him and firmly tells him “No” as if he were a misbehaving dog, causing Jason to recoil. Hades sarcastically claps once again and gets up off his throne before snapping his fingers which causes the cage to de-materialize, group Panic to get sucked up into a portal, group Pain to get healed to the point where they’re all conscious, and a piece of paper and a pen to materialize in each of their hands. Hades rubs his hands together eagerly and chuckles. “This is one of my favorite parts of the game. . .The voting. Seeing you’ve lost, you must vote off one member of your team. Write down the name of the person you wanna vote off on the paper, then come and give it back to me.”.

Hannibal looks about warily. “What happens if we don’t know the name of the person we want to vote for?”.

Hades facepalms. “I gave you a whole day to get to know each other and you lot still don’t know each other’s names? Really?”. Hades mumbles some curses under his breath. “Fine, fine! We’ll just throw the secretive voting out the window. Before you show up tomorrow, though, you better know everybody else’s names – anybody who can’t recite everybody else’s name from memory will die. Kapeesh? Kapeesh. . .For this voting period, just tell me who you’re voting for and why. Just keep in mind, there’s no revotes. . .”.

A brief period of silence occurs, Cranky rubbing his chin in thought. “I know who I –want- to kick the bucket, but I’ll wait until I’m damn good and ready to say it. He who votes last casts the deciding vote. . .”.

Pennywise speaks up first and points to Jason, who has entered another staring contest with Q. “I’m voting for this mindless idiot over here, as I’m not gonna be responsible for his idiotic actions.”. Pennywise turns to Scarmiglione, Potato Head, and Bear Hugger. “And I trust you lot’ll do the same if you know what’s good for ya.”.

Potato Head turns to look between Hannibal and Jason, deep in thought. “I don’t wanna go with the clown, but that guy with the mask was the guy who –directly- almost killed me. . .I’ll go with the guy with the hockey mask too. Why? No real reason, other than the fact he freakin’ tried to kill me. Y’know, just a bit justified. . .”.

Bear Hugger looks between Cranky and Jason briefly. “Eh, there’s no way that old monkey could’ve lied to me, and I made up with that clown hoser, so. . .Yeah. What they said.”.

Pennywise motions to Scarmiglione. “Scar? Some help here?”.

Scarmiglione sighs before motioning off to Q. “That one’s the real threat, consssssssidering he dropped a damn piano on us. True, the masssssssked one is mindless, but ssssssssso is he, and he is hostile to all of us. . .”.

Pennywise turns to Scarmiglione and puts his hands on his hips an squints at him angrily before Scarmiglione shrugs innocently, then Q motions forward at Jason, intelligent enough to realize what’s happening. “Weak.”. In response, Jason points to himself questioningly and moans questioningly, but Hades shrugs. “Well. . .Seeing he can’t talk, doesn’t know anybody’s names, and is too stupid to write them down if he did know them, I’ll take that as his vote. He’s votin’ for himself as far as I’m concerned. . .So that’s 5 votes for this monster movie reject – that’s a majority.”. Hades turns to Jason. “Any last words before I condemn you to eternity in the underworld?”. Jason attempts to moan, but Hades immediately interrupts him. “Good, didn’t think so.”. Hades pats Jason on the head. “You’ll make a good attack dog for me down here, don’t worry, I’ll put you to good use – you’ll get to do what you enjoy.”. Jason moans questioningly, after which Hades chuckles before turning deadpan in an instant. “You actually thought I was serious? –Really-? You’re as worthless as they come – you can enjoy a nice eternity with all the other souls trying to find their way outta the underworld.”.

Pennywise rubs his hands together eagerly and chuckles. “Do people –float- in the underworld?”.

Hades smirks back at Pennywise. “Hell yes. . .They float. And I’m sure after you’re voted off you’ll enjoy getting to experience it, along with maybe catching up with this good friend of yours right here. I’m sure he’ll give you a warm welcome.”. Hades grabs Jason and levitates over to the edge of the area, next to the gigantic chasm of souls from the Hercules movie. Without a second thought, Hades tosses Jason in casually and turns around, not even bothering to watch. Potato Head, Bear Hugger, and even Cranky are a bit disgusted at this, with Scarmiglione having a look of regret in his eyes as he looks at Jason specifically. Jason’s flesh starts dematerializing as he sinks deeper and deeper into the chasm of souls, but before they can even finish watching Hades claps his hands and rubs them together. “Well then. . .Now that the first obligatory death is behind us and the guy nobody gave a damn about it is dead, the real game begins. . .”. Hades chuckles as he opens up a portal to suck up the remaining seven members of the group. . .



  1. That was… pretty great. I really love the roster of characters this time compared to the last two – there is nary a single one I wouldn’t say has some interesting features to them. Again, you were able to adequately describe each of them without dropping them out-of-character – which is impressive considering there are 16 of them.

    The boss fights in particular were really gnarly. Not only extremely difficult from the sounds of how brutal they are, but very well crafted. Mr. Luggs in particular had some lovely interactions between the table, food and blast zone that make it one of the better bosses I’ve read.

    In all, I kinda dig most of the cast. Only ones I’m not sure on are Haunter, considering he can only make expressions and gestures. He’d be the one I’d want to die next, though the rest… it’s kind of hard to choose from them.

    In terms of who to win, I’d pick Von Kaiser purely out of bias. I did particularly enjoy the parts involving Duke Oliver, Pegasus and Edgeworth – so many laughs had with Oliver’s strange obsessions. Even quirks like with Q are actually really interesting to read as they unfold.

    One thing though: Team Panic was just wandering around in the graveyard randomly all that time? Seemed a little awkward that they even split up if they were just going to run around in any given direction. It’s okay given the needed focus on individual characters, but eh.

    Hades really makes an excellent host, along with his minions Pain and Panic. This is definitely better than Zant in the first and way simpler than that borderline Star Wars fan fiction in Survivor 2. In all, by far the best starting chapter so far.

    Please, please continue this; after experiencing it for myself, I do understand the pains of writing a long SM like this, but I’m invested after that first chapter. This actually seems about ten times more promising than Survivor 2 anyway.

  2. so THIS was your project =O. Anyway, this is starting off better than Survivor 1 or 2: you picked a pretty diverse cast that you can actually write for, and Hades is perfect as a host. You don’t even try to avoid making it a complete sausage-fest this time, but you don’t really know how to write for female characters besides Raven anyway.

    The cast really is great: Jason was by far the least interesting, but he’s already gone. I honestly can’t think of who I want to go next, all the characters actually play a role this time. If any Survivor deserves to be seen to its conclusion, its this one.

  3. Day 2 please? (A)

  4. ^^^^^ what he said (Y)

  5. Stop writing 10875921831987246 DragonBall Z sets and start writing more of this. (D)

  6. Make Day 2 (D)

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