Posted by: masterwarlord | October 28, 2015

The Illbleed Slaughter – Part 2

Part 1

So after a break that was over a year, I decided to come back and continue this story mode. This story mode was probably my favorite that I’ve done, and the format is open enough to actually continue it rather than starting yet another new one. I thought there was fun potential to be had with the characters made since the release of the last one, and I wanted to play out their interactions.

Considering the readership of the last part appears to have consisted entirely of Smady, FA, Katapultar, Bionichute, and David of all people, I don’t feel the need to fill an arbitrary quota of characters by certain authors and just picked the characters I actually wanted to write for. These characters really helped to make new material for the story mode, whereas the plans involving characters by other authors were bland to non existent, to the point I didn’t want to continue writing. Needless to say, those plans have been scrapped. A prime example of this is the trainer characters whom were agreed upon as being terrible, and whom I have since retroactively removed from the story mode since they only had one scene where they didn’t do anything anyway.

I have a lot more plans to continue the story mode for a part 3 and possible part 4, and only stopped here because it was the place that made any amount of sense to stop rather than in the middle of one of the many ongoing arcs. Many characters have yet to reappear such as favorites like Jin Gitaxias, and it will take a considerable amount of time to address them all in a project of this scope while introducing even more characters. No, even after part 2, I’m still not done introducing characters.

With that, enjoy the first “chapter 2” of a MasterWarlord story mode since the original survivor.


We get a shot of VIKTOR in Michael Reynolds’ museum creating a much more elaborate setup of machines to defend himself than the poor Engineer could ever hope to as the final hours of the neutrality zone tick down. The Engineer is obviously exhausted, and most of the other characters previously seen in his group are long asleep. Viktor continues toiling away, apparently not needing to sleep or simply having much more drive than him. He is approached by a group of characters consisting of MR. 2, PRIME MINISTER HONEST, Syura, L’BELLE, and THE GRIZZ. Honest goes to speak up first, but is quickly beaten to the punch by the Grizz. “Alright, for rizzle, your machines are the real deal, man. We were with that sucka over there before, but you’ve got a real sick crib over here, dawg. What say we crash with you?”

Viktor laughs. “You are more than welcome to join the glorious evolution.”

The characters look rather legitimately surprised and the Grizz chuckles nervously. “F-Fo real, man? You gonna hook a brotha up?”

URGOT comes up alongside Viktor. “You can’t beat us, so you will join us…You will make me a good new pair of legs.” He bursts out into laughter.

Honest glares at The Grizz. “Oh how I will look forward to killing you off…Who made you the spokesperson? Now they are not taking us seriously.”

Syura comes forwards on his father’s behalf. “Look, we’re not all useless. If I so choose, I could undo all of what you’ve done in one fell swoop.”

Urgot just laughs again as Viktor replies. “Really, child? Your first approach of fearing us was correct. Do not threaten us if you value your pathetic life.”

Syura goes over to one of Viktor’s many, many constructs, a battlecast Kog’maw, and places his hand on it before it seemingly vanishes into nothing. Urgot was laughing the whole time but immediately stops upon seeing this. “What? WHAT?! That should be impossible! The time…It must have slipped too fast without us noticing!” Urgot fires forward his generic acid hunter projectile at Syura for it be blocked by the neutrality zone as usual. Still in denial, Urgot fires another, and another, before finally giving up.

Syura puts his hands on his hips and laughs. “Are you done?”

“But how?!”

Viktor fidgets about with some sort of control. “Relax, Urgot. All is well. The Kog’maw is not destroyed. It has simply been transported outside the building.”

A few moments later, it can be seen walking back in through the entrance, entirely unharmed. “I suppose that does not technical qualify as violence…”

“That’s right, it doesn’t. So unless you want me to destroy all of your nice little robots, you will let my father and I join your group.”

The Grizz is very visibly upset by this. “Just yo fatha’ and you? What about us, dawg? We gave you the idea in the first place!” Syura places his hand on the Grizz and teleports him out of the building before glaring at the remaining two characters standing there, L’Belle and Mr. 2. They look at each other, at Syura, then back at each other frantically before running off.

Viktor nods in approval. “Very well, you have convinced me, especially by shedding most of the dead weight. You may join…Though speaking of weight, let us be honest. This father of yours, does he have anything to contribute? Why would I not kill him once the time is over?”

Syura looks at Honest, not really knowing what to say. Honest shrugs. “I…Too, have a power. I can turn anything I touch into food. I can’t really show you here, that’s obviously violence.”

“Very impressive…Then, you wouldn’t mind demonstrating it? I can spare a mere Kog’maw for such a purpose.”

“Well, erhem, you see…It…Only works on organics. This should be a bonus for you, should it not? It means I can’t betray you!”

“A very good point. In that case, how would you like to kill that stupid bear man for me?”

Honest is relieved as he at least has a good excuse for that. “Well I can’t, the neutrality zone is still up.”

“Yes, but with your son, there, you can kill anyone regardless of neutrality by sending them outside, can you not? This should present no problem.”

Honest groans. “I’ll come up with something…Come, Syura. We’ve got to-“

“No, no, no. You, you will go alone. If your power can do that, you should have no problem with such amateurs, no?”

“I just TOLD you. I need him to send them outside the building.”

“Your son, he will stay here. If they come in, he will send them back out. Do not come back until you are able to provide me with three delicious meals and proof of their deaths.”

Honest is furious at how far Viktor has called him out on his bluff and looks frantically at Syura who looks content to just go along with it. “Lazy, good for nothing Syura…Must I do EVERYTHING myself? Very well. I will definitely return before the 24 hours expire.”


Hannibal Bean opens a portal back into the neutrality zone and stares in awe of all of the robots Viktor has made. “I want in on that for sure.” He opens a portal back to his two shaky “minions”, Putata and Ratigan, who are sound asleep. Hannibal, still in his larger size, whips them awake with his vines. “Alright, boys. I’m sure y’all must have noticed that over there.” He beckons over to Viktor’s robots.

They stare in shock, Ratigan’s jaw dropping, with Putata replying first. “No…No, that was not definitely not there before.”

“Well good lord, how long have you been asleep for?”

Ratigan yawns. “Feels like I was asleep for over a year…”

Putata nods. “That’s how long it’d take to build that many robot sets!”

Hannibal sighs. “Look, that engineer over there? His tech is garbage. We need these now.”

“I’m not sure I can even hack into something that advanced.”

“Well you’re gonna have to if ya want me to make you lot big. Look, soon as you do it, I’ll make you big. No catch.”

Ratigan looks at a battlecast Kog’Maw that already looks giant compared to them before staring at the battlecast Cho’Gath in the back that is gigantic compared to even normal sized people. “You make that sound so easy…”

“Look, I’m a hell of a lot more interested in these than just some turrets. I’ll help you out.”


Level 14
Hannibal Bean, Putata, Ratigan

This level has some of the giant battlecasts as stage hazards, along with Urgot and Viktor, but there are tons of tiny machines to actually function as enemies in this level, largely based off the hexmites in Viktor’s moveset. The level has you entering into the battlecast Cho’Gath, using its body as the terrain before the last leg of the level takes place inside of it.


Putata has successfully reached the core of the machine and starts fidgeting about with it. Ratigan shakes a stray hexmite off of his leg before walking over to Hannibal. “Alright, we’re in, we’ve held up our end of the bargain. What about you?”

Hannibal looks at Ratigan as if he said something crazy. “You’d just kill us if I made you big in here. We’ve still got to get this machine to work for us anyway.”

“I told you, I can’t help with this utter nonsense. I helped you get in and clear this place out. Let me out and make me big, as a token of good faith?”

Putata nods. “Y’know what? Yeah. Make him big! Make him big or I won’t work on this mech for one more minute. I wanna see if you even can!”

Hannibal groans. “Fine, have it your way.” He portals a ways outside and gives Ratigan his moby morpher. Ratigan uses it and becomes human size and laughs while Hannibal folds his arms. “Are ya satisfied now? Now hand it back.”

Ratigan just keeps laughing. “Give it back? Give it BACK?! Why would I ever do something so foolish?”

Hannibal squints at him, looking as menacing as a blob monster can attempt to. “You really think it’s a good idea to make an enemy of ME?”

“I’d have to kill you eventually anyway, and you’re nothing without this ‘moby morpher’. GoodBYE Hannibal, our partnership is over.” Ratigan does a dismissive handwave to the bean and walks off, leaving him furious as he portals off.

Hannibal shows up back inside Battlecast Cho’Gath next to Putata, trembling in anger as he is now stuck at bean size. “Rat stole my morpher! Should’ve predicted it and taken him outside neutrality.”

Putata chuckles. “What, you think you could beat him at that size?”

“I’d just kill him from the inside, just like we’re doing to this here machine. Wouldn’t be the first time. And don’t you DARE laugh. You need that morpher just as much as I do if you wanna be big after all’s said and done….”

We cut back to Ratigan as he walks over to the Engineer’s group, only the Engineer himself still awake. “Well howdy. Haven’t seen you round these parts before.” Ratigan ignores the Engineer and proceeds to open up the back of Beezwax’s truck, apparently looking for something. “Hey now! The hell do you think you’re doin’?” Ratigan doesn’t respond for the Engineer to go man his turret. “If you don’t step back right now, I’ll-“

Ratigan interrupts the Engineer. “Oh, please. You know as well as I do that you can’t hurt me.” Engineer runs over and attempts to close the doors to the truck, but is easily outmuscled by Ratigan. “Relax, human. I will leave you with all of your precious ammunition for whatever good it will do you…I will need all the help I can get to defeat those people over there.” He motions off to Viktor.

“You insultin’ my sentries?” Ratigan ignores him. “Look, stop going through all my stuff! What’re you even looking for?”

Ratigan finally finds the bee cage containing the Keroro platoon and picks it up. “This.” The frogs are still seen swirling about in the cage with the bees and Tamama’s puke. Tamama screams at the sight of Ratigan, considering he already beat them all to death when he was at regular size. Ratigan opens the cage and empties it, causing them to fall to the ground (cushioned by neutrality) and onto the puke as the bees fly about randomly. Tamama goes to just run away, but Giroro stands before the now giant Ratigan. “Thanks for freeing us, lord Ratigan. I will look forward to our new partnership.”

Ratigan laughs. “Partnership? Look, I only got you frogs back because I have leverage over you…If me killing you wasn’t enough motivation, I can make you giants if it suits my needs. Interested?”

Before Keroro can even think of objecting, Giroro agrees on the group’s behalf. “You’ve got a deal!”


The Grizz, Mr. 2, and L’Belle are at the museum entrance. The Grizz dusts himself off. “Yo, that crap does not fly with me, G! Who does that a brotha?”

L’Belle nods. “Indeed, our options are slimming…It’s obvious that those peasants with the truck and turrets are a lost cause. The fat bearded man was too smelly anyway.”

“Yeah, it might be time to look for a new hood. Ya dig?”

“Quite. It may be time to progress the boundaries.”

Mr. 2 puts up his hands in front of himself and shakes his head. “No, no, no, no! We can’t leave. People ain’t so tolerant of us folk out in the rest of the world!”

The group are approached by Honest for L’Belle to look even more unimpressed than usual. “Oh, great. It’s YOU. What could YOU possibly have to tell us after that display back there?”

Honest places his hands in front of himself defensively. “Relax, relax! I’m in this with you guys now. My son betrayed me shortly after he betrayed the lot of you, the little scamp. We have to leave, because otherwise he’s going to just teleport us out for those robot men to kill us.”

L’Belle shrugs, seeing no reason to disbelieve him. “Well Mr. 2, it appears the decision’s already been made for us. We’d best be off.”

The group leaves, Mr. 2 whimpering as they do so. They are confronted by Duke Oliver who has finally made it back to the museum, battered and bruised from his encounter with Nemesis. L’Belle cringes at the sight of Oliver. “Good lord, what happened to you? You’re hideous.”

“Well, you see, L’Belle, just be glad you weren’t selected to-“

L’Belle shields himself with one hand as he interrupts Oliver, spraying him with perfume from head to toe. “Here, let me freshen you up.” Oliver begins choking on the perfume heavily as he flails his hands in front of his face, falling over. It is more than annoyance, Oliver looks as if he’s in legitimate pain.

Honest grins. “Maybe I’ll have a chance to kill somebody sooner than I thought.” He takes a bottle from L’Belle. “Here, let me help!” He joins in spraying perfume at Oliver. Mr. 2 starts cheering Oliver on in as flamboyant of a fashion as you’d expect.

The Grizz of all people has to act as the voice of reason and takes the perfume away from Honest and L’Belle. Despite his incompetence, he is a bear, making him the physically strongest of this pathetic group. “Stop it, dawg, yo’ killin’ this poor sucka!”

“I thought you of all people would appreciate the art going into this, Grizz…”

Oliver gets up, sparkling in cliché fashion. “Nay, on the contrary. I feel reinvigorated! That’s some good stuff! I can feel the beauty oozing out of me!”

Grizz is perplexed. “Look, I’m all about abstract and shizz, but some art just’s bad.”

L’Belle places a finger on his chin. “Hmm. You look better than most under those effects. Still, you pale in comparison to me.”

Oliver is not fazed by this comment. “Well of course I do, I could never be such a beautiful subject as you. When this is over, I will give you a position in one of my castles.”

L’Belle chuckles, flattered, before regaining his composure. “Well, of course I am! But now, we really must see about finding a more temporary castle.” The group heads off.


Wizard Bowser and King Boo are seen leaving out the back entrance of the museum again, deciding they don’t want to deal with Viktor. They don’t go far before encountering YORICK, who stares intently at the group. Bowser has an aside with King Boo. “Do you know this guy?”

King Boo shrugs. “Don’t remember him from inside the place.”

Yorick loudly addresses them. “DO YOU REMEMBER YORICK MORIE?”

Bowser is more weirded out by the guy than anything. “No, why would we?”

Yorick is highly offended by this. “You WILL remember Yorick Morie!”

Bowser, thoroughly unimpressed, walks up to Yorick and punches him in the face, sending him flying back a good 15 feet and falling onto his back. “Yeah, no. I don’t remember weaklings.”

Yorick laughs as he gets up, not particularly harmed despite the force of the punch. Suddenly, the corpses of Lemmy, Kamek, and Kammy come up from out of the ground. “Do you remember THEM?”

Bowser stares at the corpses of his former servants, actually somewhat scared. Lemmy reaches out towards his father. “Why did you let me die?”

Kammy waves her wand at Bowser angrily. “Why did you kill me?!”

Kamek is even slower than the others as a zombie and is hobbling towards Bowser. “KILL ME.”


Wizard Bowser, King Boo Vs. Lemmy, Kammy, Kamek, Yorick

The three zombified characters are all out at once to start off the match, and while their AI is not lowered they have their movement speeds decreased to worse than Ganondorf and have all their lag multiplied by 1.3x. Yorick will spawn after any of them are killed, and he is not handicapped in any way and has a fairly overpowered moveset involving pitfalls. Only Yorick must be killed to win the fight, with the other zombies crumbling to dust afterwards.


Bowser actually feels remotely guilty as he goes to punch Kammy, given her the opening she needs to dump a yellow block on top of him. King Boo gets the message and goes to fight her on Bowser’s behalf, having already killed Lemmy. Kamek comes at Bowser, and Bowser hesitates at first before grinning, remembering his earlier betrayal. “Forget you, Kamek! Punching you is easy!”

Bowser punches Kamek for the camera to abruptly cut to Yorick. “DO YOU REMEMBER-“

Kamek’s corpse is knocked into Yorick, interrupting him, prompting Bowser’s laughter. “Remember that!”

Bowser goes to run up to Yorick, but is blocked by a large group of human zombies. Yorick looks around at the zombies, confused. King Boo notices they’re not under Yorick’s control. “What’s the matter, gravekeeper? Are these zombies not yours?”

Yorick shoves Kamek’s fully dead corpse off of himself and gets up. “Yorick Mori does not remember these.”

BRANDON WHITTAKER comes out among the zombies, holding a sign that says “undead are people too”. He comes next to Yorick and shakes his hand. “I’m so sorry for what these horrible people have done to you. Picking on you just because you’re undead!”

King Boo is annoyed. “You know that I, too, am technically an undead, right?”

“Pbbth! Just because you happen to be undead doesn’t mean you’re not intolerant! You’re self loathing!”

Yorick nods in agreement. “Yorick Mori will remember that!”

King Boo thinks the matter over. “Should I bother to point out I’m an undead KING?” King Boo looks as if he’s about to say something before the camera cuts back to Brandon ranting about intolerance. King Boo thinks over his dialogue, drowning it out. “This guy’s not even worth it.


Level 15
Wizard Bowser, King Boo

This level is mainly a beat’em’up against hordes of zombies. Some are generic and realistic, while some are based off of Yorick’s overly cartoony zombies.


L’Belle, Mr. 2, Duke Oliver, the Grizz, and Honest approach a movie theater that proudly proclaims that it is airing “Toyhunter” and go to head in. The Grizz is apparently excited over it. “Aw yeah, Toyhunter 3 was the bomb. Didn’t know another one was out.”

Honest continues to be impressed by Grizz’s stupidity. “Aren’t you a bit old for children’s films?”

“Hey now, hey now! This ain’t just for kids! There’s deeper philosophical meanings and stuff!”

L’Belle is disgusted. “If we were going to view any film, it would not be one with such ugly western animation.”

Oliver is excited regardless. “So what is this ‘film’ you’re talking about? This place is a theater, is it not? I do love plays.”

Mr. 2 spontaneously does a pirouette for no reason. “Oh but so do I! I used to be a smash hit!”

Honest stares in disbelief at the group of characters he’s with, walking into the theater with them. “We’ll just get killed if we go in there and just watch a movie. That’s idiotic…But I shouldn’t say anything. This could be my chance to kill them while they’re distracted.

The Grizz notices Honest is unenthusiastic about the movie. “Aww, come on, old man! Loosen up a little! Maybe you’re not into art, but I’m gonna guess you won’t say no to this!” The Grizz grabs a bag of popcorn and fills up a cup from a soda fountain as speaking before handing them to Honest.

Honest is still unpleased. “Astute observation, Grizz. Yes, I’m fat. Congratulations.” Honest doesn’t want to take it and demean his character, almost turning away, but then he hastily turns back around and grabs them, stuffing his face full of popcorn. “Aw, who the hell am I kidding?”

The group goes into the viewing area for it to be a dark room and for the door to shut behind them, looking nothing particularly like a movie theater. The voice of Michael Reynolds booms throughout the room. “This is an interactive movie. You will be playing the role of toys in the new Toyhunter film, ‘Cork goes to hell’. This is not something you merely sit and watch, the setting and characters are aallll REEEEEEAAAALLL. So, if the enemies get you, you will die. So, come and enjoy, Toyhunter! As if your life depended on it…”

Honest hastily goes to try to open the way they came in, but it’s locked tight. The other characters don’t even seem that opposed to this, with Mr. 2 beaming. “Guess I’ll get the chance to show ya my okama acting style after all, my friends!”

Oliver nods in agreement. “I always wanted a chance to go into theater. I am sure someone as beautiful as yourself would do splendidly in the role of a ‘toy’.”

A door opens to the next room and the characters go through, Honest begrudgingly going along as the door again slams behind them. The next room is a giant set to make the characters look like toys in Sid’s room from Toy Story. L’Belle is disgusted at the room’s décor, though the Grizz is more impressed. There isn’t much chance for them to comment on it before a horde of SID’S TOYS approach them, regardless.


Level 16
L’Belle, Prime Minister Honest (No Syura), The Grizz, Duke Oliver, Mr. 2

This level features the various enemies not in the Sid’s Toys moveset as generic enemies while spawning the actual moveset multiple times throughout the level, with plenty of platforming over the giant generic room. The first two times the moveset spawns the weight of it will be drastically decreased to make them more resemble generic enemies, but the final time it will be a full on Brawl with no handicap on the overpowered moveset, cruelly placed at the end of the rather difficult level.


The Grizz is seen freezing Roller Bob’s wheels in place before ripping off the upper torso of the generic action figure off of the skateboard in a surprising act of brutality. Honest looks at him and seems remotely afraid of him, but has no time for this as he’s busy running away alongside L’Belle from Babyface, the last remaining toy. He goes to trip L’Belle into it as uttering a casual “oops” for L’Belle to be trapped underneath the toy’s giant spider legs. He sprays perfume at it frantically, but what with it essentially being a machine this has no visible effect. He squirms about underneath it, frantically dodging the spider legs, before managing to get out from underneath it. He manages to climb up on top of a table full of legos built in some elaborate display the others have already escaped to for the time being. They seem to appear safe, but the legos spontaneously form into a giant version of BLOCKS. He laughs. “Not so fast, ya prancers! I’m gonna knock your block off!”


Level 17
L’Belle, Prime Minister Honest (No Syura), The Grizz, Duke Oliver, Mr. 2

This level is lego themed, with the enemies being various forms of lego golems rather than actual lego line products. The level is not a constant chase, but occasionally throughout it he will appear to chase you through short segments with a tidal wave of legos, or extending his hand up out of the ground.


Blocks Vs. L’Belle, Prime Minister Honest (No Syura), The Grizz, Duke Oliver, Mr. 2

You start as a giant Blocks and only fight the characters one by one, all-star style. Your power is buffed as if you had a super mushroom, and while you’re allowed to go down to regular size you will lose the power boost. You cannot run out of Blocks, instantly regenerating to the max amount, so feel free to shoot out as many as you want.


The characters are not even attempting to fight Blocks and are going out of their way to flee him still, and even then he is doing a good job of hunting them down. Mr. 2 attempts to change his face into a generic lego character’s and stands next to a generic lego human. Blocks runs on by at first before coming back and entering a pondering pose. “Hey, my man Sid would never EVER get a figure that was such a prancer!”

Blocks punches Mr. 2, prompting his face to return to normal. He goes to hit him more, but he dodges around his attacks with elegant dance moves. Blocks is only getting further infuriated by this. “Look, I don’t say this lightly, punk, but you’re the biggest prancer I’ve ever seen. That’s an accomplishment.”

“I’m just stylin’ on you, you just can’t appreciate my Okama Kempo!”

Blocks forms a cage of legos around Mr. 2 and laughs before forming his humanoid form inside the cage alongside Mr. 2. “Don’t drop the soap, buddy boy!”

He looms over Mr. 2 menacingly before Oliver bursts through the side of the flimsily made prison as if he were the Koolaid man. “Stop, in the name of beauty! I will not allow you to harm one hair on this beautiful man’s head!” Mr. 2 comes up alongside Oliver, transforming his eyes into stereotypical gigantic anime eyes and clasping his hands together as he stares adoringly at him as if he were a knight in shining armor.

Blocks just stares at this as they run off together, his brick jaw dropping as he just utters a static “uuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhh…” He eventually shakes his head to reaffirm himself before going to chase after the next nearest character of The Grizz.

He slinks into the ground to merge with the legos there as the Grizz runs off into a lego plane. He wipes some sweat off his brow in relief, thinking he’s safe, before the door bolts shut and the camera zooms out to outside the plane, showcasing that the “nose” of the plane is in the shape of Blocks’ head. It begins speaking as it starts to drive on down a runway. “3…2…1….” The planes goes up off the ground and begins flight. “And we have liftoff! First stop, ground zero!”. The Grizz can’t open the door, so he looks out the window that he’s much too fat to squeeze through. The Blocks plane is clearly heading towards lego replicas of the twin towers.

“You-You can’t kill me, man! I’ve still got so much art to make!”

“You should be happy then! You’re gonna become one with art!” Blocks laughs hysterically as ramming into the towers and covering the Grizz in legos. Blocks forms the rubble back into his body to actually showcase the Grizz’s body, dead. He looks from side to side and laughs. “Alright, who’s next?!” The other characters are ready to just jump off the lego display table, but the sound of thunderous footsteps can be heard. Blocks gasps and hastily deforms into a pile of legos while the other characters are spontaneously stopped in place.

The camera focuses on Honest, who is very visibly trying to move as he sweats profusely. “Why can’t I move? It’s like I’m surrounded by that accursed neutrality zone!

Sid enters the room and sees several of his toys destroyed and his table of legos in a wreck. He lets out a childish angry scream. “Really Hannah? REALLY?! It’s one thing to break those toys I stole from you…But my LEGOS? I’M GONNA KILL HER.” Sid goes ever to where the lego twin towers stood. “She even destroyed my 9/11 memorial! It was so cool!”

He gathers up the bodies of L’Belle, Mr. 2, Oliver, Honest, and the Grizz, as he can’t really tell he’s dead. “And she even left her gay dolls in here!” He looks over them with disgust, particularly L’Belle and Mr. 2. “Are these even supposed to be guys…?” He throws the majority of them away while only keeping Mr. 2. He rips off Mr. 2’s head in an explosion filled with a comically excessive amount of gore and goes to put it onto something else. His eyes are still moving as his head gets ripped off, frantically zipping about as he goes wide eyed before he’s decapitated. In true Illbleed fashion, Sid ignores the disturbing fact that blood is oozing out of the toy. Sid goes to pick up L’Belle next, but is called away by his mother for dinner and leaves the room. The characters are able to move again, and L’Belle takes deep breaths, looking as if he were about to have a heart attack.

Oliver reaches out longingly towards Mr. 2. “Oh, my beauty Mr. 2…How could I ever have failed to protect you? I don’t even deserve to be called a connoisseur of beauty after such a grievous error…I should go out the honorable way.” Oliver approaches the edge of the table and extends his arms, preparing to suicide.

L’Belle reaches out after Oliver. “No, don’t do it! You can’t leave me with HIM! Your beauty is a gift to the world!”

Oliver hesitantly goes to turn around. “You’re right, I still have so-“

Oliver is interrupted by Honest casually poking him with one finger, causing him to tip forwards. He frantically flails his arms to try to steady himself, but fails and topples over. The camera cuts to Mr. 2’s decapitated corpse before he spontaneously regenerates his head out of nothing, looking quite pleased with himself. ”And people say shapeshifting my face is a weak devil fruit! Ha!” His expression quickly changes as he sees Oliver falling to his death. He gasps before jumping off of the workbench he’s on, going to get underneath him, screaming an elongated “no” in stereotypical fashion. “Think, Bon chan, think! My little Okama body won’t cushion his fall! What would Okama King Ivankov do?! Ivankov…That’s it!” He shapeshifts his head into Ivankov’s, which is comically oversized and giant as Ivankov’s head normally is. They land on the ground, and Oliver has his fall cushioned by the gigantic head of Mr. 2. While Mr. 2 is able to regenerate damage done to his head, Mr. 2’s body is still tiny underneath the giant head it is supporting, causing it to get horribly, horribly crushed underneath the combined weight of his head and Oliver’s obesity. As Mr. 2 is now dead, his face does not regenerate the damage this time, leaving him as a horrible mess of flesh.

Oliver quickly gets up off of his corpse and tries to get his body out from under his flesh. “Mr. 2! Bon Chan! Speak to me! I only wish to hear your soothing voice one more time!” Oliver pauses for a moment before pounding the ground and weeping. Suddenly, a spray of water starts falling on Oliver’s head.

Oliver turns to look up to see Honest crying a comically large amount of tears from the top of the table. “Oh Mr. 2! What will we ever do without you?!” Honest stops his tears abruptly as he gains a static expression. “Oh well. Nothing to be done about his death.”

Oliver angrily points back up at Honest. “Silence, you ugly, UGLY man! This is all your fault!”

Honest is annoyed that his crocodile tears have failed him. “Have you looked in the mirror lately?”

“How DARE you even suggest that I am ANYTHING like you?”

Oliver goes to work his way back up the stack of toys to get back onto the table to confront Honest once again, enraged and working his way back up the table with a ridiculous amount of agility for a man so fat. Honest looks mildly worried as he gets up and approaches him. He turns to look at L’Belle. “Uh, don’t you think we should get going?”

L’Belle brandishes his spear and points it at Honest. “You won’t be the first monarch I’ve pierced into…Though you’ll definitely be the ugliest. I’ll have to get a new spear once I’m through with you.”

Oliver puts an arm in front of L’Belle. “Nay, L’Belle. I can’t risk losing your beauty as well. Allow me to protect you, in the least.”

The camera cuts to Blocks, who has formed a lego throne for himself to view the action in. He is eating out of a bag of potato chips, but when he reaches his hand into the bag he merely pulls out yet more legos to throw into his mouth. “Best. Job. Ever.”



Duke Oliver Vs. Prime Minister Honest (No Syura)

You can pick either character for this match, regardless of how ridiculously protagonistic Oliver was made in the last scene. It’s largely a minion battle that will last long due to the high weight of both characters, with Honest’s healing going against Oliver’s superior recovery when he lacks Syura. Throughout the match, you’ll get commentary from Blocks on his throne in the background.


After the battle is over, what is actually happening in the cutscene is a pathetic slap fight between two elderly fat monarchs. The most exciting it gets is them rolling on the ground together in a big ball of fat before it goes back to the usual. The camera cuts to Blocks having emptied his bag of potato blocks, holding it upside down and shaking it, disappointed. He throws it away and sighs. “Well, the buildup was good. Fight was lame. Just like wrestlin’.” Blocks gets up off his throne and walks over and easily rips them apart from one another. They both go to flee from him, and he lets Oliver go, only holding onto Honest.

Honest desperately claws at the ground, frantically trying to get away. “Why me?!”

“Look, I’m staff here. I ain’t just a lowly participant like you fellas. You broke the rules of the attraction.”

“What rules?!”

“You killed another toy. That means you’re going to toy hell!”

“…But I didn’t destroy a toy. He was a human. I killed a human!”

“Is that supposed to make it sound better, ya dirty murderer?”

“Well, no, but…You, you can’t just make up the law as you go along! Only I’m allowed to do that…”

“Mikey left me in charge here! My word’s the law!” Blocks goes to drag Honest out of the room through a door in the wall that’s not part of the set and only meant for staff, which hastily closes behind him.

The screen fades out and back in before Blocks has successfully locked Honest in a jail cell. He dusts off his hands and goes to leave. “Your execution’s scheduled for an hour, then it’s off to toy hell.”

After he’s gone, a generic toy policeman guard comes to approach Honest. “You get one final meal. Choose wisely.” While Honest was obviously depressed, he slowly forms a grin on his face after this is said and begins listing off a ridiculous amount of food.


L’Belle is seen trying to find a way out of the room, as Sid has closed the door and they can’t get back out the way they came. Oliver is just depressed and doesn’t want to help. “Stop, we’ll never get out of here…”

L’Belle puts his hands on his hips. “Well, certainly not with that attitude! I’m not used to doing this kind of peasant work myself. Aren’t you supposed to be protecting me?!”

“I suppose I am.” He sighs, sitting next to the Grizz’s corpse. “We also lost him in all of that chaos. He was a true artist.”

L’Belle comes over and enters a thoughtful pose. “I know what’ll cheer you up. Come now!” He takes the Grizz’s crown and pimp cane before crowing Oliver and giving him the cane. “I’m sure he would’ve wanted you to have them.”

Oliver looks over himself. “Ah, yes! I feel splendid! It would be shameful to let such accessories go to waste!”

The moment is interrupted by the sounds of pounding on metal. They go to look at the source of the sound for KON THE KNIGHT to have busted down the grate leading into the ventilation system. “Howdy ho, buckaroos! Time to ride me on home to safety!”

L’Belle and Oliver hastily run towards the grate while Kon comes out and looks around. “…Is it really just you? These guys look so weak…

Oliver nods. “Sadly…Our strongest members met a tragic death in battle, while the traitor was punished accordingly.”

Kon folds his arms. “Well, uh, they can’t have been the strongest if they’re dead, right? You two survived! That means you gotta be in the saddle of leadership, right?”

L’Belle nods. “Oh, but of course! Well they did have good taste, that doesn’t mean they weren’t ultimately peasants.”

Oliver glares at L’Belle, but Kon continues. “Well whatever…Look, I’m your host for the rest of the attraction, so y’all can just follow me.” He turns around and goes to head into the ventilation system, an evil grin forming on his face once it’s out of view.


Level 18
Kon the Knight, L’Belle, Duke Oliver

This level takes place in the ventilation system as promised, and has the generic rat enemies that you would expect. While you’d think this would be primarily a platforming level, there is a strange variety of rats to provide several enemy subtypes, mutated into various forms, making this level longer than some of the others. There are several segments where you have to run against the ventilation system’s push, so while you can play as the old characters once again, Kon is very preferable for this level given his vastly superior movement speed. Some metal walls will randomly come down to crush you at times as well, making little to no sense.


Honest is enjoying a massive feast inside of his jail cell as if his life depended on it, showing no sign of slowing down as an officer brings him in yet another plate of food. After a few seconds of watching him eat, Blocks comes back into the room. “Hey, what’s the holdup?! This guy was scheduled to be executed like 40 minutes ago!”

A toy cop salutes Blocks. “He’s still having his last meal, sir!”

“And I’m givin’ my last crap about that stupid rule! I’m givin’ you the authority to kill him, right here, right now!”


Level 19
Prime Minister Honest (No Syura)

This level is a pure beat’em’up against primarily cops and lego golems, with some of the cops being disguised as dummy men. This is a very long beat’em’up, so some random Illbleed enemies are thrown in for variety, making plenty of sense given how random Toyhunter is in general. You only have one stock for this, making it quite difficult, but what makes it winnable is a gigantic stockpile of food items for you to consume. They will never flesh out of existence and expire unused, so you can make use of them throughout the fight. A couple of pity food items are dropped by some of the later waves regardless. This is still a very difficult fight, as Blocks himself will spawn after all of the waves for a final confrontation.


Honest is seen taking a bite out of a sentient rotten Illbleed egg with arms, killing it. Blocks steps out from amongst the minions, thoroughly unimpressed. “The lot of you couldn’t kill one fat old geezer? Guess I’m the warden for a reason.”

Blocks goes to form his hands together into a hammer of legos. He goes to raise it behind his head to prepare for a heavy swing. Honest sees his chance and tackles Blocks while he’s bending backwards, causing him to topple over and cause a good portion of his blocks to go flying all over the place. Blocks’ signature black brick core flies out from underneath Honest, floating solitarily in midair briefly before Blocks’ body forms back around himself. “Heheh, nice try, gramps, but I’m invincible! You keep on hittin’ me and I’ll just keep on puttin’ myself back together again and again!

Honest quickly goes to grab a particularly large chicken leg during the second half of Blocks’ speech before throwing it right at Blocks’ core, knocking the core out of him and causing the rest of his body to crumble to nothing. It quickly goes to reform around him again, but Honest jumps on top of it to isolate it. The core cries out in pain. “UNGH! How did you know about my weakness?!”

Honest grins, quite satisfied with himself. “You didn’t even try to hide it. I’ve had to deal with powers that make far less sense than yours.”

The bricks coming towards the core form into hands that try to pry Honest off of his stomach. “How are you this heavy?! Give it back!”

Honest, still in a very desperate situation even now, goes to dispose of Blocks’ core in the only way he knows how – eating it. Blocks screams horribly as he enters the old man’s body. “EYUCK! I did NOT sign up for this!” The blocks begin forming around Honest. “But you still haven’t beaten me, gramps! I’ve got my building block mocker!” Honest goes to try to shake the blocks off, but it doesn’t take long for them completely cover him. “Puke it up if ya don’t wanna die!” He specifically attempts to constrict the blocks around Honest’s stomach to try to force him.

Honest looks incredibly sick and wipes the blocks off of his face in order to keep his hands over his mouth. He almost vomits it up, but he forces himself to keep it down. As this incredibly painful struggle goes on, a figure emerges out of Honest’s shadow behind him, none other than Black Sabbath. A Stand Arrow emerges from his mouth before it is fired through Honest’s gut, impaling him, but also impaling Blocks’ core inside of his stomach. Blocks dies immediately as all of his pieces fall to the ground lifelessly, but Honest has a few final moments before he passes. “Another one? ANOTHER one?! I single handedly destroy some kind of horrible rock golem, and then ANOTHER one comes to finish me? I deserve better than this…” He closes his eyes as the scene fades out and Black Sabbath goes back to the shadows from whence he came.


Kon busts down some a metal wall, obviously having been doing most of the work while the others follow him. “Feel free to help at any time…Didn’t think I’d have to carry y’all this hard.”

Oliver applauds Kon. “Oh, but we would do that? Watching you work is truly a sight to see. You are truly a majestic horse.” Kon grits his teeth before forcing it to turn back into a smile again. Oliver is too daft to catch on, but L’Belle goes out of his way to keep a bit more distance from Kon as they continue on before eventually encountering FATHER CORNELLO. Oliver takes an aside with Kon. “And who might that fine fellow be?”

“Oh, that’s no ‘fine fellow’. That’s Father Cornello, priest of toy hell! He’ll use his no good alchemy to turn you into glue! After we beat him, we’ll get to the end of the attraction. C’mon, my little buckaroos!”

Cornello puts up his hands to tell them to stop. “No, stop! You must listen to me, that man, he’s-“ Kon goes to headbutt Cornello before he can say anything else.


Kon the Knight, L’Belle, Duke Oliver Vs. Father Cornello

Even if you lose in a 1v1, you’re specifically given 3 stocks, as this fight is supposed to be easy.


Cornello sends his rat/lion chimeras at the characters and tries to block off Kon by transmuting up another wall, but is foiled yet again as he gets smacked in the face and knocked back a considerable distance. “Listen! This abomination isn’t whoever he says he is. I just escaped from his little camp not too long ago. He’s going to use you as a slave!”

Oliver for some reason is buying into everything Kon says. “Escaped from his camp?! How dare you! It is a slave’s duty to serve his master!”

Kon speaks with a considerably gruffer voice as he goes to threaten Cornello. “I told you to SHUT UP, you old bastard!”

Oliver raises an eyebrow. “Such words should not come from such a majestic creature…”

Kon attempts to do a stereotypical southern accent again. “Well, ya see, partners,“ He groans. “Y’know what? Forget it. You two haven’t done anything the whole time. I’ll just drag you back to our dear leader…”


Kon the Knight Vs. L’Belle, Duke Oliver, Father Cornello

This is a 3v1 fight as a regular character, but L’Belle and Oliver are given level 3 AIs to represent how weak their characters are. While Cornello has a level 9 AI, he starts with 80%.


The scene opens on Honest’s corpse, which is smothered in blocks, food, blood, and puke. A ghostly apparition of Syura suddenly appears next to Honest, and Honest’s eyes open as he slowly gets up off the ground, somehow still alive. The arrow used to impale him phases into nothing before his eyes, startling him as he goes to look at what is apparently Syura.

“Oh thank god! I can’t thank you enough for getting me out of that, Syura…” Syura doesn’t reply. “Perhaps you’re not so useless after all…I knew you’d find some way to slip out from those robots to come help me. Yes. I knew it all along!” He pauses as Syura continues staring at him. “What exactly happened to you? Why do you look like that?” He extends out a hand for it to go through “Syura”. Only then does Honest finally realize that this is not his son. He starts waving his hand around, causing Syura to move around responsively to it, before grinning. “You’re better than Syura ever was!” He laughs as he makes his stand do an idiotic looking jig.

If you’re really Syura, you should be able to…Hrm…” Honest plays around with Syura a bit longer before having it touch him, causing him to teleport himself onto the ceiling and fall onto his dinner table. He utters a curse as he gets up. “He made it look so easy…Maybe I shouldn’t have been so hard on him? No, that’s silly.

While a bit painful, this does confirm to Honest that the stand has his son’s ability of teleporting things. He plays around with it some more, with the stand always appearing next to him. “Syura couldn’t teleport himself, but this thing shows up next to me wherever I go, so I basically can. I’m even more powerful than him.

Honest goes to leave his jail cell, facing no opposition considering how many guards he already disposed of. He eventually sees a guard running down the hallway carrying a pizza. He goes to run straight past him. Honest chuckles. “That’s quite alright. I, er, the prisoner is already full. He’s going off to be executed.”

The guard doesn’t bother to look at Honest and keeps running. “Don’t joke around! This isn’t for you! This is a prisoner’s last meal!”

Honest is very confused. “I guess he just didn’t understand what I said? No…He’s not going in the direction of my cell…Interesting.” He follows after the guard to eventually see POLPO eating the pizza he saw just moments ago as if it was nothing. ”Good god. And I thought I was fat.

Polpo turns to Honest, though he’s much more interested in his stand, changing his static expression to shock at the sight of it. He hastily points at Honest’s stand and talks with his mouth full. “That’s…How did you get that stand?”

Honest notices Black Sabbath in Polpo’s cell and points at him in response. “So, does that guy work for you?”

“Yes, that’s my stand…Nobody else here should have a stand. I sent it to kill the prison warden here. How could it possibly have hit you and given you a stand?”

“It’s a long story.”


Prime Minister Honest Vs. Polpo

You finally have access to Syura as Honest, even if it’s a ghostly recolor of him. A decent amount of food spawns at the start of the match that you and Polpo will largely be playing king of the hill over. A couple of generic enemy guards will spawn during the match, but they are more beneficial than anything, as while they are very weak they will all drop meaty food items upon death. This is a very long fight with the absurd amounts of healing and Polpo’s weight, and you may be forced to consume food at 0% just to prevent Polpo from getting it.


Honest’s stand teleports Black Sabbath away from the fight, leaving him vulnerable, before teleporting Polpo someplace different entirely. The scene cuts to Kon chasing L’Belle, Cornello, and Oliver before Polpo spontaneously falls in-between them. Polpo is big enough to completely block Kon from continuing pursuit, and is in fact so big that he’s heavily scrunched up in this position and can barely move. Kon has a look of sheer disbelief on his face as he tries to ram Polpo out of the way. “MOVE!” Polpo, unable to do much else and incredibly disoriented, summons Black Sabbath to try to defend himself from the immediate threat attacking him.

L’Belle looks back at Polpo. “What…What just even happened?”

Cornello only takes a passing glance. “Don’t even question it. Just go! We may have a chance against his master when they’re separated like this.” They manage to reach another open vent, which causes them to instantly show up inside the room of another child. Either Sid has a weeaboo brother, or more likely it was just a lazy transition between set pieces in typical Illbleed fashion. Several action figures from the Dragon Quest franchise can be seen as sentient building a pyramid, being whipped furiously by slave drivers.


Level 20
Father Cornello, L’Belle, Duke Oliver

This level exclusively consists of Dragon Quest enemies, most prominently featuring slave drivers and the various creatures their recolors can summon in the game. Towards the end of the level you’ll work your way up a pyramid of toy blocks for the finale.


We see Viktor, Urgot, and Syura in the Michael Reynolds museum before Honest walks back in, making sure he does that instead of teleporting to not show his power. Syura is disappointed when he sees his father is coming back without any excuse, but figures he’s going to talk his way out of it. Honest looks absolutely beaming after having come back triumphantly from his quest. “Alright, guys. I didn’t drag them all the way here, cause they’re really fat, but I killed them.” He beckons them to come along with him. Urgot and Viktor are open minded about this, having seen plenty of weirder things. Honest goes around the corner to showcase the corpses of The Grizz and Mr. 2. “There you have it, boys.”

Urgot is confused by the hideous corpse that is Mr. 2, flipping it over to see the body underneath the giant head. Viktor is still only marginally impressed. “I thought you said your power was turning people into meat?”

“Well…Look. I lied about that. I have a different power.” He points to the ghostly Syura over his shoulder. “That’s my power. And I still killed these guys like you asked.”

The camera shows the vision of the other characters, who don’t see Honest’s stand because stands are only visible to other stand users. Urgot attempts to waddle around Honest’s fat body, figuring he may be blocking it, but still sees nothing. “What power?”

“He’s right there! Are you blind?” He points again.

The camera shows some overly detailed infrared vision of Viktor before he gets impatient. “You are covering your lie with another lie.”

Honest rolls his eyes. “Of course they can’t see it…Guess what’s what I get for telling the truth. I’ll have to come up with a lie that’s more believable. Oh…I suppose you wouldn’t be able to see it while the neutrality zone is up. That’s why.”

Viktor is clearly aggravated. “I don’t know what to think anymore. Do you have an opinion on this man, Urgot?”

Urgot shrugs as much as he can with his awkward body shape. “You were with two others…Bring their bodies back as well, and we will forgive you for your lie. That will prove that whatever power you have is worthy.”

Syura tries to help his father out. “Look how much trust we’ve put in you already! Do you really expect us to-“

His father interrupts him. “No, no. I’ll do it. This time I’ll be back in 15 minutes.” Honest chuckles as he leaves the room, leaving behind a rather confused Syura. “With this new power it’ll be all too easy…


KING KOROL is seen sitting on a throne at the top of the toy pyramid with four generic toy slaves fanning him. He watches excitedly as they go to fight a mammoth, but is rather disturbed when Cornello pushes it off the pyramid with a wall, causing it to topple down. King Korol gets up off his throne. “What have you done with my servant?”

Cornello decides this is a good time to bluff. “He’s dead. I’ve killed him with the assistance of my two new powerful allies.”

Oliver laughs at Korol. “Soon, your slaves will work for somebody worthy. We’ll have that castle I promised you, L’Belle!”

The bluff seems to work as Korol is quite disturbed. “…It’s time to go. We’re going.” He turns to the slaves. “NOW, NOW YOU IDIOTS!”

The slaves pick up Korol’s mobile throne and begin to carry him off, but Cornello fires a beam of red lightning from his cane to knock out one of the soldiers, killing him off and causing the misbalance to cause Korol to fall forwards out of his throne and painfully fall down the pyramid a couple of steps. He would probably fall down the entire way like this, but he uses a disruptive wave to push himself back onto the pyramid. “I suppose you leave me no choice then.”

Before the fight scene can break out, Honest appears out of nowhere alongside his stand, as he now has a significantly overpowered ability to use at will. “Alright, there you are…” Honest vanishes just as quickly as he came before we cut to Kon pushing against Polpo in the ventilation system. Polpo spontaneously vanishes out of thin air, causing Kon to topple over forwards on his stomach. We cut back to the top of the pyramid for Honest to show up before the gigantic Polpo shows up out of thin air and comes crashing down on top of the pyramid.


King Korol Vs. Father Cornello, L’Belle, Duke Oliver

You start with 4 slavedrivers and a gigantic pyramid bigger than what’s normally possible to have. Still, this isn’t exactly enough to combat 3 opponents at once. Your saving grace is that every 16 seconds, Honest will portal in Polpo’s gigantic bloated corpse 2 Ganondorfs above either Oliver or L’Belle at random before it falls down and crushes them. Polpo will fall through the stage, much like Snorlax. He deals 28% and knockback that kills at 70% on contact, and while he will spawn above those opponents it’s still possible for him to hurt you. Note that if the last opponent left is Cornello, Polpo will stop spawning, as Honest only needs to kill L’Belle and Oliver. You’ll want to knock Cornello into Polpo as he falls down, getting as many of them hit by him as possible. It becomes significantly easier after one of L’Belle/Oliver are dead, as then you’ll actually reliably know where Polpo will spawn instead of a coin flip.


The cutscene picks up right where it left off, with Polpo’s girth crushing the period underneath his weight, and taking L’Belle and Oliver down with him. Honest teleports himself to the ground as the pyramid collapses so that he will not be caught in the wreckage, then has his stand start teleporting all of the wreckage out of the way, along with Polpo himself, to get to the corpses of Oliver and L’Belle. He eventually retrieves them and teleports them off before having his stand come and touch him, enabling him to leave as well. Cornello and King Korol are too disoriented from the pyramid collapsing to really realize what just happened, but Kon has made it through the ventilation system and got to have a good view of it all.

Korol eventually gets up and isn’t even mad at Cornello anymore, angrily approaching Polpo. “You! How DARE you destroy my beautiful pyramid! Do you have any idea how long I, er, my slaves had to work to build that?!”

Polpo is still in too much pain to speak. Kon appears to try to simplify matters. “It wasn’t him, dear leader. He was basically…A blunt weapon, used by this other fat guy.”

“I’m afraid you’ll have to be more specific than ‘fat guy’.”

“Okay then, a bearded guy. He’s like, able to teleport people around. I saw him do it. He took two of those guys that we were trying to enslave.”

Polpo regains his senses. “He has an invisible servant called a stand. That’s why it looks like he’s able to do it without even touching things…You lot shouldn’t be able to see it.”

Korol picks up the whip of a slave driver crushed by the falling pyramid and whips Polpo. “I don’t care! You crushed it, you rebuild it!” He turns to Cornello who is trying to escape during this conversation. “And don’t think I’ve forgotten about you either!”

Polpo barely notices that he’s been whipped and summons Black Sabbath. “Do I really look like I would be a useful slave? You can’t possibly hope to defeat Black Sabbath anyway.” Korol goes to use his ice breath on Black Sabbath, but he’s not hurt at all. Black Sabbath proceeds to smack Korol in his wide open mouth, causing him to fall over on his back in pain. “If I wanted to, I could just kill you…But I can’t allow anyone else here who has a stand to live. You’re going to help me kill this guy.”

Kon is annoyed and still thinks Polpo can be defeated fine. “How would we even kill a guy who can teleport anything, anywhere, anytime?”

“He’s a participant, so you’ll have to kill him eventually anyway. You will act as my scouts to locate him, then I will send my invincible stand, Black Sabbath, to kill him. I can’t exactly track him down myself.”

Korol is still furious. “We will kill him on our own time, with or without you. For now, you will do as you’re told and build my pyramid!”

The camera cuts back to Cornello, who has fled the room by destroying a wall with alchemy. Before Korol can get even more angry, the scene is interrupted by a giant middle aged Japanese man entering the room, going to head over to his computer. The characters are again frozen in place by a neutrality zone as this occurs, like when Sid appeared. The man walks into the room and sees his Dragon Quest collection ruined before he promptly dies of a heart attack. The characters are briefly unfrozen. Kon looks at the dead giant in disbelief, going on top of him and kicking him to test if he’s still alive. “I thought this was supposed to be a child’s room?”

Polpo chuckles. “I guess he’s a manchild.”

“You would know.”

They are frozen again when an elderly Japanese woman enters the room and shrieks before talking in Japanese. The scene fades out and back in before the dead man is seen in a coffin, with the still frozen bodies of Polpo, Kon, Korol, and 4 slave drivers being dropped in with him. The man’s mother speaks as the toys are dropped in with him, with her Japanese dialogue being subtitled. “Here, Togashi, your favorite Dragon Quest figures.” The lid on the coffin is closed.

After another transition, the characters are now in a generic hellish landscape, complete with stereotypical fire and brimstone. Kon gets up hesitantly. “What WAS that?”

Polpo is the only one who isn’t completely confused. “I remember the lego golem said that he was going to try to take me to toy hell…Guess this is it. It’s some sort of stupid theme park attraction, relax.”

Korol has absolutely no intention to trust Polpo. “Then you can stay here and rot in this accursed ‘toy’ hell! Without your interference, the guy wouldn’t have died, and none of this would have happened!”

Suddenly, a large pillar of fire emerges and begins advancing towards the characters, prompting Kon to jump back. “Is that fake too, fatso?”

Polpo is annoyed at how desperate the others are to make an enemy of him. “The voice at the start still said everything here was real and could kill us.” They all begin to run to escape the flame, but Polpo obviously cannot keep up and starts burning up in the fire. The fire quickly becomes too much for Korol as well, forcing him to jump onto Kon’s back to escape it. ZODICK THE HELLHOG then runs up alongside Kon, easily passing him and doing circles around him. He mocks Sonic’s “you’re too slow” taunt in gibberish before the level starts.


Level 21
Kon the Knight, King Korol

The level has you start as Kon with Korol riding on your back. Kon’s acceleration is much slower when he has Korol with him, but his top speed is still the same. At a certain point, you’ll swap control to Korol, turning the stage into a scroller as Kon essentially functions as a moving platform. You have to kill the enemies along the way when playing as Korol, aside from not falling off and dying. A single slave driver will sit on Kon’s back for Korol to use for attacks, not enough room for any more.

As running along, you’ll encounter yet more Illbleed enemies, but also some generic demon cats. Zodick appears throughout the level as an invincible hazard when you’re Kon, but when you’re Korol you’ll have to KO him as he runs along with you, multiple times. Zodick only has 8 weight and takes full hitstun here, and when the stage is scrolling very quickly it’s still pretty easy to kill him.


Polpo is left behind in the rapidly moving pillar of flame and is set on fire. The camera cuts to show a control room for the attraction with two generic human Illbleed technicians at the controls. “Alright, we’ve sent out Zodick, when do we sent out Dr. Egghead after them?”

The other worker looks at Polpo, who is rolling about on the ground desperately trying to put out the fire. “Crap! I think one of the participants might have survived. He’s too fat!”

“Guess we’ll use Dr. Egghead on him then.”

A vehicle resembling a giant version of Dr. Eggman’s eggpod begins flying over. As its pilot, there is a generic sentient egg with arms, the standard Illbleed enemy, but giant in size. The bottom of the eggpod opens for a horde of the evil eggs to come out of it, which all go to attack Polpo.


Level 22

This is a beat’em’up level against the egg enemies, with Dr. Egghead dropping in the waves and occasionally throwing in attacks of his own. Once the last wave is over, he’ll leap out of the eggpod and fight you himself as a giant version of the enemy. Throughout the level, you’ll get colorful commentary from the technicians.


Polpo is seen devouring one of the eggs whole, but is getting overwhelmed by the eggs due to their sheer numbers. He sends Black Sabbath into the control room to kill the two technicians. This does not cause the eggs to immediately stop, so Black Sabbath has to take the controls. He dumps Dr. Egghead out of his eggpod before scooping up Polpo with it. Thankfully, there are functional controls inside of the eggpod itself, enabling Polpo to fly it.

He recalls Black Sabbath before going to fly it out of the area, looking for any kind of exit. He passes by Korol and Kon, who are still busy with Zodick. Kon calls up to him. “Hey, buddy! We could use some help here!”

Polpo just laughs at them. “I offered you plenty of chances to join me, but you insisted on making me your enemy…You can deal with that monstrosity yourself.”


Zodick Vs. Kon the Knight, King Korol

This is a fast scrolling level, so you barely have to even do anything to kill Korol, he’ll just die due to not being fast enough. The main match is with Kon, and while he is perfectly capable of surviving the scrolling, he’s a dumb computer, so this isn’t terribly hard either way.


Zodick takes a bite out of Kon as he neighs in pain, then knees Korol to knock him off of Kon. He goes to pin Korol with one foot, but before he can do anything more Black Sabbath appears to help. Kon looks relieved. “What made you change your mind?”

Polpo looks mortified. “There’s something far more horrific than this thing ahead. Let’s just take care of this one while we can.”

Zodick looks at Polpo and lets out a low guttural sound as he steps off of Korol, quite angry. He edgily gives Polpo the finger and utters a single audible word. “RoBUTTnik!”


Polpo Vs. Zodick

While Polpo is durable, Zodick is also very durable, and Polpo lacks the mobility to get rid of his rings before Zodick can just pick them up, making it quite problematic. Polpo’s hurtbox is so big that it’s also very easy for Zodick to hit you with some kind of momentum based move as he passes, as well as easily escaping your range. While this fight is normally quite difficult, if Polpo can manage to tether Zodick with his Up Special it becomes a lot more feasible.


Polpo bites into one of Zodick’s legs, scraping off metal coating to reveal a mechanical leg underneath. We cut back to the control room where two more Illbleed technicians have come in to replace the old ones, having shoved the old now dead ones out of their chairs. “Oh god, Zodick is losing too! We still need him for the pizzeria attraction!” The scene cuts back to Zodick, who goes to flee the fight regardless of having been doing fine. Zodick still has some form of sentience and is obviously hesitant to leave, shaking his fist at Polpo before running off.

Polpo just takes it before and there’s a pause before Korol looks around to see if there’s any immediate danger. “So what exactly was more horrifying than that?”

Before Polpo can reply, a portion of the obviously painted backdrop retracts to show a giant television screen behind it. The screen zooms in to just show what’s on the screen, showcasing some scientists in a lab. One of them happens to be a child. The video begins being narrated by the voice of Michael Reynolds. “At Tocaraca industries, a group of men were hard at work trying to find the cure for an incurable disease. The elder Tocaraca, founder of the company, was a revered scientist in the field. His only weakness was his son, whom prevented him from doing the research he was capable of in his youth. The younger Tocaraca, Tocaraca the second, was a very difficult son to please. Even when the elder Tocaraca allowed little Tocaraca2 to participate in his lab alongside him, it wasn’t enough. He wanted to start his own project…” Tocaraca can be seen holding a terrified ALICA VASSIN before he puts her on an operating table. “The younger Tocaraca wanted to create a superpowered ‘flame kitty’ out of his house pet whom he had named Alica. While the other scientists thought it was stupid, the elder Tocaraca agreed to fund the project. While it may have been possible with the elder Tocaraca’s skills, the younger Tocaraca refused to listen to criticism and did things his own way.”

We get a shot of Alica escaping the lab. “When the project failed, Alica took the first opportunity she could to escape the lab, but Tocaraca refused to accept failure. He placed all of the blame on Alica for not having the ‘will’ to become a flame kitty. He used his father’s money to hire an assassin to track her down, as he now hated her for being unable to become what he always wanted.” The scene cuts to the woods. “The cat was on a hunt for food in the forest. What she didn’t know was that about 25 metres above her-” The narrator pauses and coughs. “I’m sorry, 25 metERS above her, was a helicopter, with an assassin watching her every move, planning out carefully how he was going to take her out. When questioned by the assassin about if this was a realistic decision to drop a nuke to kill a house pet, Tocaraca simply replied that this was HIS universe now, and that he didn’t have to be realistic. The pilot ejected the bomb on Tocaraca’s command, and it plummeted towards the forest. Alica looked up at a bird flying through the air, and spotted the bomb getting closer and closer.”


Level 23
Alica Vassin

This level has you dodging bombs, falling trees, and general fire in the forest. The enemies consist of realistic soldiers with guns. While the moveset is quite a joke, it is fairly playable, even if you’ll end up just spamming a couple of overpowered moves.


Alica’s story continues after the level. “She leaped to the side, escaping death by centimetre-centiMETERS. Wounded and in shock, she attempted to run, but instead limped. As she turned around, the flames created by the explosion spread out into the forest. She knew she would not survive.” The scene changes to her in the generic hellish landscape the characters presently are in, Alica now with a fiery aura. “When she came to, she found herself in hell. Her fur and flesh had been pretty much all been burnt away. She was no longer just an ordinary pussycat…She had become…Flame Kitty. Miraculously, Tocaraca’s raw desire to turn her into a flame kitty had managed to change her into one in the next life. Now, she only awaits the arrival of her master, killing all who oppose him.”

Alica’s story finally ends as we cut back to Korol, Kon, and Polpo watching the screen. Korol is drumming his fingers on top of a slave driver’s hat. “Well that was a terrible story. Can we leave now?”

The “flame pillar” that was previously chasing the characters forms into the shape of a gigantic cat roughly 10 meters tall before forming two generic teal eyes on it. It goes to pounce at them before the boss battle begins.



King Korol, Kon the Knight, Polpo

Alica is a giant boss roughly the size of Galleom in Brawl. She has 1000 HP, with the stage being a generic walk off. While you can stand inside of Alica, staying in contact with her when she’s not attacking will still deal 4% per second. She takes up about half of the stage with her size, and while she doesn’t idly move, she can change the position she will be “resting” at during the end of some of her attacks.

Polpo has access to his eggpod during this boss battle, which gives him a hover and slightly faster movement speed to enable him to actually dodge some of the boss’ attacks that he otherwise couldn’t.


Pounce: Alica goes to do a laggy pounce at the current position of your character, dealing 28% and knockback that kills at 65% on contact. This is laggy enough that it’s easy to avoid, and Alica also has long ending lag where she remains collapsed on the stage afterwards. After that, she’ll lazily walk towards the nearest side of the arena. There’s enough ending lag in this attack that once she reaches a side of the arena, she’ll immediately perform her next attack with no cooldown period. You may want to bait her to jump into the middle of the stage so you have more time when she’s vulnerable. If you can edge her slightly more towards one side, you can attack Alica as she lazily walks through you afterwards to do some extra damage, merely taking a bit of passive fire damage as she does.

Pussycat Claws: Alica starts rapidly swiping at you through the air as she walks across the stage to the other side, dealing several flinching hits of damage, 20% per second. Every 20 hits she does a swipe that does knockback that kills at 80%. To avoid this attack, you need to jump over Alica, which can be quite difficult as she goes on and off of her hind legs regularly during this attack. You can also just roll through her and take a bit of passive damage before hitting her from behind as she stupidly completes her attack pattern.

Fire Breath: Alica breathes fire, dealing 80 hits of 1% and flinching as pushing characters towards the opposite blast zone. If she starts when you’re already close to that side, this attack can potentially kill you, though this is rare. The only safe place to stand is inside Alica. The fire breath lasts 3 seconds, so you’ll be taking 12% from this, but you can in the least hit Alica when she’s using this attack.

Fire Tornado: Alica becomes a whirling vortex of fire and sweeps back and forth across the stage with rapidly accelerating speed. She’ll go back and forth two-four times (Varying on her health) across the stage before ending at the opposite side of the arena she started at. She deals 30 hits of 1% and flinching per second during this, and is invulnerable during this attack.

Fiery Rain: Alica turns into fire and goes off the top blast zone before raining down as fiery projectiles that do 8% and weak knockback that kills at 200%. She rains down in 100 Mario fireball sized projectiles over 5 seconds that spawn fairly randomly. This seems to easily be her weakest attack, but it’s the hardest one to avoid taking any damage at all from. If high in the air, it’s possible the fireballs can combo into each other.

Tocaraca Attacks:

Every 10 seconds, Tocaraca will come by in his attack helicopter and perform an attack. He is too high to attack, though if you somehow hit the helicopter with an attack that does 20% or more in one hit it will be forced to retreat and not perform the attack.

Flame Kitty Nuke: This is the primary attack Tocaraca has. The helicopter will release a nuke down in the center of the stage, creating a large area of effect attack that deals 20% and turns you into a fire elemental. The nuke’s hitbox has the width of the entire stage, reaches into the air 1.5 Ganondorfs, and lingers for a bit of time under a second. If Alica is using fiery rain, this can be very difficult to avoid, and you may have to voluntarily get hit by a few fireballs to launch yourself upwards (at the risk of being comboed by them). With Pounce and Pussycat Claws, you’ll have to avoid the attacks the more difficult way rather than hiding in Alica’s body.

Being a fire elemental causes you to take 1% damage forever, but has a much more horrifying side effect than that. If you ever overlap with Alica’s hurtbox fully, you will be absorbed, instantly dying and healing her of 60%. This completely changes around the dynamics of Alica’s attacks, and makes pounce one of her strongest moves.

Fiery Creeper: The helicopter drops a Creeper from the Minecraft franchise that is made up of fire. The Creeper will follow you at Ganondorf’s dashing speed before exploding on contact to deal 18% and knockback that kills at 90%. If you evade the creeper for 2.5 seconds, it will explode wherever it is. If the Creeper comes in contact with Alica’s hurtbox, she will absorb it, healing her of 60%. If Alica is going to run into the Creeper, you’ll have to go out of your way to go shield it to prevent this.

Assuming it is not absorbed by Alica, wherever the Creeper explodes creates a small hole in the ground the size of Bowser. This hole will not protect you from most attacks of Alica and Tocaraca, with the exception of Alica’s fire breath and Pussycat Claws. If you have become a fire elemental, it is mandatory to have one of these pits to hide in when she uses fire breath unless you want to take a ridiculous amount of forced damage.

Desperation Attack:

Kamikaze: When Alica is under 126 HP and the helicopter comes by, it will do a dive bomb towards the stage at an alarming speed, dealing 35% and knockback that kills at 55%. The helicopter of course explodes into flame, leaving a gigantic 1.3x Bowser sized fiery hitbox that deals 30 hits of 1% and flinching per second. This hitbox lasts forever until Alica’s hurtbox overlaps it, at which point she will absorb it and heal 60 damage. If you survive this long and aren’t a fire elemental on your last stock, you’ve generally won the fight, as Tocaraca obviously will not perform any more attacks.


Korol and Kon are seen using their ice breath on Alica to finish her off, having significantly shrunk in size. In a last ditch effort, the helicopter goes to dive bomb Kon and Korol. Polpo gets in the way with his giant eggpod before leaping out of it, shielding them with it as Tocaraca explodes. A door in the generic painted wall opens leading to the actual outside, which the characters waste no time in going through. Polpo is breathing heavily after doing a feat that required any agility whatsoever. “Let us never speak of that again.”

Kon laughs. “Well hey, Polpo, if we don’t speak of that again, we won’t be able to talk about our new partnership.”

Korol is less enthusiastic. “You didn’t need to do that…But fine, you have my thanks. You have been promoted from slave to slave driver.”

Polpo accepts that that’s the best he’s ever going to get out of Korol. “We still need to hunker down and find some sort of base…I’m not much one for traveling long distances. Based off your beloved pyramid, I’d assume you would find that agreeable?”

Korol nods. “Yes, we must find more slaves and build a new empire. Preferably in a less ridiculous location.”

Polpo beckons over to Kon. “Is he your equal?”

“Oh, of course not. He’s just the slave driver supervisor.”

“Then I’d suggest we send him and Black Sabbath to scout out any potential locations to use. There’s no reason we should have to strain ourselves after what we just went through.”

“Not a bad proposal…Agreed.”

Kon is of course upset about this. “Well hey, why should I have to do it when he gets to do nothing? I’m the supervisor, he’s just an ordinary slave driver!”

“Well I’m the king! Kon, you are demoted from slave driver supervisor to regular slave driver! Now go!”

Kon is annoyed but agrees to go, with him and Black Sabbath running off in opposite directions.


The Kremlings and Snowmads have killed Trent/Nature’s Prophet, with plenty of frozen tree sap around the area along with the corpses of the woodcutters who helped in the fight. Kudgel is continuing to club the tree’s corpse, for K. Rool to hand wave him off dismissively. “That’s enough, Kudgel.”

Kudgel gives one last whack for good measure, exhausted. “Now what. . .”

Fredrik slumps up against the back of the tree’s corpse, freezing it to make himself more comfortable. “We rest. . .This has been a looooooooooong day.”

“Shouldn’t we try and get back to the safe place?”

K. Rool shakes his head. “We’ve no idea how much time has passed, but it’s dark out and it feels like it’s been ages. If those twenty four hours aren’t up, they must almost be.”

Fredrik place his hands on his stomach as he continues getting more comfortable. “Now that you’ve stated the obvious. . .Bashmaster, you get to keep watch.”

“Pffft, outrageous. YOUR man gets to keep watch? How do I know you won’t betray me?!”

Fredrik chuckles. “Paranoid one, aren’t you? I’d thought we may’ve developed some comradery. . .If you’re so concerned, have your man stay up too.”

Kudgel is obviously displeased. “Then when do I and the bear get some shut eye, eh?”

Bashmaster snorts at Kudgel. “He’s your king, is he not? Show him some respect.”

Fredrik does a dismissive hand wave to Kudgel. “You can swap shifts with us after a few hours.”

K. Rool puts his hands on his hips. “Don’t tell my man what to do! Kudgel, that does NOT apply to you, you are on duty until I wake up, understand?!”

Kudgel squints his good eye at K. Rool while Fredrik chuckles slightly again. “Buh huh. . .Huh. . .Then what good is he going to be if he’s so tired tomorrow? You’re just trying to go against what I said for the sake of it.”

K. Rool goes wide eyed at having been read so blatantly by Fredrik, but is too petty to go back on his word. “Nonsense! Kudgel is one of my finest raiders, they would go for DAYS without sleep. Your men are obviously not as well trained!”

Fredrik is still quite smug about it. “We’ll see how he compares to my man tomorrow then, heh heh. . .”

The scene fades out and back in to show Kudgel and Bashmaster on generic guard duty, with a significant amount of time having passed. Kon can be seen in the distance chuckling behind cover before he runs off. Fredrik comes out of the saw mill and pats Bashmaster on the back. “Alright, pal. Good work. You can have your turn now.” Kudgel glares at Bashmaster enviously, but does not leave his post.


Kon is seen waiting impatiently next to Korol and Polpo. “When is this Black Sabbath going to get here?”

Polpo is of course seen eating a baguette. “He’s almost here now, relax. It takes a while, my stand can only understand so many orders without somebody to command it.”

“I still think it’s ridiculous you’re not just coming with us.”

Korol dismisses Kon. “We don’t have time to wait for him when all those idiots holed up in the museum come out of the floodgates. You, me, and Black Sabbath should be enough to enslave these people.” Black Sabbath shows up right on time and Korol nods. “Let’s go.”

Polpo gives his command to Black Sabbath. “Obey everything the crocodile king says.” He watches them leave. “It may be dangerous to stay here without my stand…But I’ve done far more than enough moving today already.

The scene cuts to Korol, Kon, and Black Sabbath confronting Kudgel and Fredrik outside the sawmill. Kudgel sees them approach and is quite happy. “Hey hey, King K. Rool! Did you come to give me my shift?” His mind is rather one tracked due to drowsiness, so he doesn’t even bother to ask who Kon and Black Sabbath are.

Korol is confused but goes along with it. “Why yes, it is I, King Korol. You may take your ‘shift’ under me.”

Kudgel goes to turn around and head into the sawmill. Korol is intelligent enough to realize there is some kind of misunderstanding here and decides to take advantage of the situation. “Before you do that, your dear leader requires your assistance in killing this walrus man. He opposes our rule.”

Kudgel doesn’t even care at this point. “Anything for some sleep. Guess this is as good a time to betray him as any…We’re doing it while Bashmaster can’t help him, right? Makes sense.”

Fredrik realizes that this more than probably isn’t K. Rool. “Kudgel, think about this for two seconds. You’re being tricked! Who are those other guys with him? Are you going to tell me you ‘recognize’ them too?”

Kudgel looks as if he’s thinking about it before Korol speaks. “They’re your replacement, that’s who.”


Lord Fredrik Vs. Kudgel

Mostly a normal fight, though a slave driver will occasionally spawn as a generic enemy to try to hurry things along.


Kudgel is swinging rather lazily at Fredrik due to lack of sleep, and has to squint with his single drowsy eye. He goes to rub it to try to clear his vision, but Fredrik blows his horn and becomes briefly giant before stomping on him to knock him out. Kon turns to Korol. “Well, not sure how useful of a slave that guy will be…”

Korol is annoyed at Kudgel’s failure after how well his improvised plan worked. “Just shut up and kill him.”

Fredrik goes to run into the sawmill, but Kon runs in front of him and blocks the entrance, laughing. “Oh good lord. Bashmaster better get here fast…And I guess K. Rool too.” Fredrik blows into his horn as hard as he can just to make noise, directing it into the sawmill.


Lord Fredrik Vs. King Korol, Kon the Knight, Black Sabbath (No Polpo)

The goal of the fight is to survive for 45 seconds. This would be fairly feasible as a 2v1, and for the most part it is, but Black Sabbath will sometimes spawn out of specific shadows on the map to use one of his attacks from Polpo’s moveset. Even if you kill Korol and Kon somehow, Black Sabbath is invulnerable, so you still have to wait out the timer.


The scene cuts to K. Rool and Bashmaster inside the sawmill being awakened by the sound of Fredrik’s horn. Bashmaster picks up his hammer and goes to head out. “Fredrik and Kudgel need our help! Get up, lazy Kremling!”

Bashmaster’s description appears accurate, as K. Rool takes his sweet time getting up, but he’s deep in thought. “This could be my chance to kill off these Snowmads. I’ll kill Bashmaster while he’s separated, then either the intruders will kill Fredrik or Kudgel and I will fight him together. Then, I’ll have his horn and can finally defeat Donkey Kong!”. K. Rool can barely hold back his evil laughter. “Sure thing, Bashmaster! Coming!” K. Rool waits for Bashmaster to turn his back once more and runs after him before lining up a shot and firing.


K. Rool Vs. Bashmaster

This is a scrolling stage, and if you fail to kill Bashmaster in 45 seconds you lose the fight as you reach the end of the stage.


K. Rool is seen running past the corpse of Bashmaster whom he killed off with the element of surprise before coming to the fight outside. Fredrik runs towards K. Rool for assistance. “Where’s Bashmaster?! I don’t even care, just help me!”

K. Rool grins as he comes. “I’m sorry, Freddy, but there’s only room for one king on Donkey Kong Island.” K. Rool fires a cannonball smack dab into Fredrik’s face. While this would only knock out somebody as strong as Fredrik, upon impact the cannonball then has spikes extend out of it to impale him, leaving absolutely no doubt that he is dead.

Korol puts one and two together. “You wouldn’t happen to, per chance, be King K. Rool, would you?”

K. Rool hastily picks up Fredrik’s horn, ditching his blunderbuss. He now realizes that this was probably a horrible idea, as he now has no help against Fredrik’s attackers. “I am…What difference does that make?”

“Unfortunately for you, it means you need to be erased if I’m to have a perfectly loyal slave.” The camera cuts to the knocked out Kudgel before going back to Korol as he points at K. Rool. “Black Sabbath, kill him.”

K. Rool backs away as Black Sabbath approaches him. He fires Fredrik’s horn of ice at Black Sabbath, which does nothing due to him being invulnerable. K. Rool shakes the horn angrily, expecting it to do something more. “Useless! I put myself in this situation for this lousy weapon?!” This gives Black Sabbath an easy opening to do a sweep kick on K. Rool to trip him before doing a flurry of punches at his backside while he’s vulnerable. K. Rool cries out in pain as he’s being attacked. “STOP, STOP!”

Black Sabbath promptly stops attacking K. Rool, due to Polpo’s overly vague orders to obey “the crocodile king”. King Korol stomps in place angrily. “What are you doing, Black Sabbath?! Did I tell you to stop? Go, finish him off!”

K. Rool grimaces through the pain as he gets an idea. “Black Sabbath, I want you to attack…How do I even describe him…Uuuhhh, the giant horse guy!”

Black Sabbath turns around before spontaneously doing a roundhouse kick on Kon, outraging him. Black Sabbath continues attacking Kon, with him unable to do anything about it due to Black Sabbath’s invulnerability. “Black Sabbath! You call yourself a slave?! Stop. Stop!” Black Sabbath again stops, as ordered, but K. Rool tells him to attack ‘the guy with the staff’. “Damn you, Polpo! I never should have trusted you!” Korol turns to Kon. “Kon! You’re repromoted to slave driver supervisor! YOU attack him!” Kon is busy hopping about on one foot in pain from Black Sabbath’s attacks, further infuriating Korol. “All I want are some good slaves! Is that so much to ask for?!”


King Korol Vs. K. Rool Vs. Black Sabbath (No Polpo)

You can pick either of the two crocodile kings for this fight. Black Sabbath cannot be ‘commanded’ by either character here, and just acts as a hostile stage hazard to everyone.


Polpo is seen eating food as usual before Nemesis comes over the horizon. Having failed to kill Oliver, he hopes that he’ll at least be able to kill a poor defenseless Polpo, uttering his catchphrase of “STAAAAAAAAARRRRRSSS.” He begins approaching Polpo at a slow and methodical pace, though this is more than enough to outrun Polpo if he so chose to flee.

Polpo interrupts his eating and wipes off his mouth with a napkin, sighing. He’s still very casual about the matter and not particularly afraid. “Black Sabbath should be able to take care of him, but I’m going to lose all of that credibility with Korol I was building. Not sure if I should even bother trying to explain it to him after this.

Nemesis fires his rocket launcher at the ground next to Polpo. This is what it takes for Polpo to take Nemesis remotely seriously as he gets up and attempts to scurry out of the way. The rocket hits him in the back and sends him flying through the air. Polpo hastily claps his hands and yells Black Sabbath’s name, desperately attempting to recall it.


Polpo Vs. Nemesis

Nemesis is already a very overpowered moveset, but if that wasn’t enough Polpo will not have access to Black Sabbath for the first 30 seconds of the match. To provide any kind of mercy to the player, Nemesis’ AI isn’t set particularly high. His attacks are still very powerful, but it should at least enable you to stall until Black Sabbath’s return.


Kon is seen knocked out with Kudgel in the background as the two crocodile kings fight before Black Sabbath abruptly leaves. They take turns trying to call him back to fight for them, but he ignores them, now only hearing the call of his true master. Both of them are exhausted and battered. K. Rool falls over on his rear end. “Look…Let’s just call it a draw. We can’t fight over that Black Sabbath guy anymore. We both have our own minion, we’ll be on equal footing as partners. You have a lot better taste than the last guy I was partnered with anyway.”

Korol breathes heavily and takes time to consider his response. “I came here for slaves, not partners…I’m really not used to doing this much work myself. You have no idea what kind of ridiculous crap I’ve gone through today.”

“I doubt it compares to what –I- went through. I basically came back from the dead.”

Korol shrugs. “Well hey, I came back from ‘hell’, does that count?”

K. Rool doesn’t know whether or not to take that seriously. “Why don’t you tell me about it?”

Korol starts talking, but his voice quickly fades out, along with the scene. It fades back in to Polpo having the stuffing beaten out of him by Nemesis. Polpo is seen quite bruised and battered before Black Sabbath shows up, and Black Sabbath has to shield an attack for Polpo with his invulnerable body to save him. Nemesis, confused, attempts to fire another rocket at Black Sabbath for it to do nothing. Aggravated, he goes to wrestle Black Sabbath. He eventually drops his rocket launcher when it doesn’t work to make use of both of his arms, and when with even 2 arms he can’t overpower him he goes to start biting into him.

Black Sabbath just stands there waiting for orders before going to grab the dropped rocket launcher and firing it into Nemesis’ giant mouth. This explodes his head from everything above the lower jaw, making Polpo assume he’s dead as he falls over. Nemesis gets up again, prompting Polpo to make some distance before Black Sabbath fires all of the remaining rockets in the launcher at Nemesis’ corpse until there’s nothing left.


Viktor by FrozenRoy (MYM 16)
Mr. 2 by KirbyWizard (MYM 6)
Prime Minister Honest by ForwardArrow (MYM 16)
L’Belle by Smash Daddy (MYM 17)
The Grizz by Bionichute (MYM 16)
Urgot by Chris Lionheart (MYM 8)
Yorick by Hyper_Ridley (MYM 10)
Brandon Whittaker by Junahu (MYM 16)
Sid’s Toys by MasterWarlord (MYM 10)
Blocks by MasterWarlord (MYM 17)
Kon the Knight by MasterWarlord (MYM 17)
Father Cornello by MasterWarlord (MYM 16)
Polpo by MasterWarlord (MYM 17)
King Korol by Smash Daddy (MYM 17)
Zodick the Hellhog by MasterWarlord (MYM 13)
Alica Vassin by Tocaraca2 (MYM 17)

Part 3



  1. It’s a pleasant surprise to see a new post on the Bunker, let alone see this Story Mode being continued. I quite like the direction you took by scrapping uninspiring characters that had yet to be introduced while instead add new ones from MYM16-17 and even oldies like Yorick and Mr. 2 who never made the Top 50 back in their days but come from franchises that are being repped in modern-day sets. My favorite parts of the story were Honest getting his own “Stand”, King Korol interacting with King K. Rool and Alica’s backstory, which FINALLY makes sense! Can’t wait to see more sets get mocked.

    (Jason would fit in with the horror theme of the settings lol, but he’s outdated and (probably) not an interesting character to write for as Silver once pointed out in a comment on your 3rd MYM’er Survivor with Hades as the host)

    Also, some of the levels and bosses look hellishly hard, something I’ve always noticed with your SMs even way back in MYM4-5, but I guess it doesn’t matter because nobody’s ever going to be able to play them. Just kind of bringing it up.

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